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Asking Eric: Confronting family about social media photos

Dear Eric: At a recent family gathering pictures were made and then posted on social media. I had not seen them, but I did participate at the time. I don’t want my pictures posted for personal reasons and it causes mental distress seeing them. I don’t feel that I can ask for them to be removed without causing a rift in the family. I did post a brief comment that people should ask before posting and I would do the same. It was seen by the person, so I hope they removed them. I feel it may have been done for the wrong reasons as this person posted only flattering ones of themselves. Now a wonderful memory of the occasion will be ruined in my memories. Should people think before using others’ photos on social media?

– Social Dilemma

Dear Social: Short answer – yes. There are plenty of reasons that people may not want their photos posted – maybe it’s not an angle you like, maybe you want to preserve your privacy, maybe you don’t want just anybody knowing what you get up to in your spare time. It is always a good practice to ask before posting.

And it’s not rude or unseemly to ask that a photo be removed or to be edited out of a photo. Many social media platforms make it quite easy to crop a photo or even add a little emoji over the face of someone who’d rather not be in the photo. Plenty of people do that when posting family photos with kids in them, for instance.

It’s easy to think of social media as akin to a personal photo album – indeed, many social media companies want you to feel that way. But a photo album generally sits on the shelf and is only shown to a limited audience. Social media, even with privacy settings in place, is much more public. You can and should ask for what you need in this case.

Read more Asking Eric and other advice columns.

Send questions to R. Eric Thomas at [email protected] or P.O. Box 22474, Philadelphia, PA 19110. Follow him on Instagram and sign up for his weekly newsletter at rericthomas.com.

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Asking Eric: Relatives leave gifts but don’t come inside to visit

Dear Eric: My sister and brother-in-law live a couple of hours away. My wife and I get along with them but are not close, and we try to make an effort to see them when we are nearby (a couple times a year). We have a pre-school-age child, while they do not have kids. They are kind and generous to our child when they see him and bring him gifts from their travels when they do see him.

Our son has no cousins or family members that are close in age to him, so we try to encourage strong relationships with the adults around him. Recently, we didn’t answer our door when our family members dropped by, unannounced. We were in the backyard. They deposited some nice gifts by the front door and left, sending a text message of regret.

On its face, this gesture is considerate and appropriate. But we were truly disappointed. We don’t want our son to receive random gifts and material objects, we want him to know his aunt and uncle, have a bond with them, and associate any material gifts with them and their love. Our relatives have done this more than twice, so it’s a pattern.

It’s hard to know how to tell them that their kind gesture fell very short with us. Had they given us 15 minutes advance notice (or even called while on the doorstep), we could have seen them. Every response I imagine sounds ungrateful for their gifts. Is it too much to ask them to spend a little time with their nephew?

– Time Is Better Than Gifts

Dear Time: You’ve got a situation that’s almost worthy of an O. Henry story. But all is not lost. They have good intentions, as do you. And everyone is trying to be generous. That’s a great place from which to start.

Thinking generously about their actions, maybe they don’t want to bother you or presume that parents of young kids don’t have time to entertain. Working from that premise, you can start to proactively encourage them to behave differently when they visit.

Try saying something like, “we really hate to miss you; next time you’re coming by, just give us a call when you’re on your way. We’ll be happy to make a visit work. Seriously.” You can make it plain that you want them to build a relationship with your son and invite them to spend quality time with him. “It’s so important that our son knows you; can we set a date for a proper visit?”

Keep the focus on the future, as much as you can, rather than talking about the last fly-by visit. Sometimes people need explicit invitations. But it seems their hearts are in the right place so, with a little guidance, their actions will follow.

Read more Asking Eric and other advice columns.

Send questions to R. Eric Thomas at [email protected] or P.O. Box 22474, Philadelphia, PA 19110. Follow him on Instagram and sign up for his weekly newsletter at rericthomas.com.

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Country music star makes cameo on ‘Duck Dynasty: The Revival,’ gives songwriting advice

Will Robertson, Jr. needs a little help writing a song.

Who better to turn to than Luke Bryan?

In the latest episode of “Duck Dynasty: The Revival,” Willie Robertson tasks his son, Will Robertson, Jr., with writing a song for a live recording at the family’s LO Worship Night.

Bryan, who is Robertson’s partner in his deer hunting brand, Buck Commander, makes a cameo on the popular reality show with some advice.

“So Will, you gonna start messing with songwriting?” Bryan asks the younger Robertson. “My advice for songwriting is just, you know, I’ve always said just get out there and live.”

He also encouraged Robertson Jr. to find a specific place to write his music.

“Hey, feel lucky that you’re a good enough person where your parents want you back,” Bryan jokes. “We’re at a phase where we don’t know where we want our children right now.”

Bryan wasn’t the only one to chime in.

The Robertsons also got a visit from Tyler Farr, who sat down with the younger Robertson and started working on a song.

“There’s a big draw of family back home,” Robertson Jr. told Farr. “Abby and I both have family in West Monroe. Everybody is kinda wanting to pull us back. So I’m having a hard time in navigating that.”

“I mean, that sounds like a country song,” Farr encourages him.

Before meeting with the country music stars, the younger Robertson made it clear he had no idea what he was doing.

“I’ve never written a song in my life, ever,” he said. “… Do you know how hard it is to write a song? Sometimes it takes years to write a song.”

Mark Heim is a reporter for The Alabama Media Group. Follow him on Twitter @Mark_Heim. He can be heard on “The Opening Kickoff” on WNSP-FM 105.5 FM in Mobile or on the free Sound of Mobile App from 6 to 9 a.m. daily.

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Miss Manners: I’m confused by people who say they are asking something politely

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I often hear someone say something along the lines of, “We politely ask that you refrain from …” or “We politely decline to accept …” Silly question, but this doesn’t make sense to me: If you’re asking or doing something politely, should you actually SAY you are doing that thing politely?

GENTLE READER: The correct form is, “We respectfully ask (or decline),” which Miss Manners would normally agree is silly, except that it is not easy to convey respect in very few words.

Please send your questions to Miss Manners at missmanners.com, by email to [email protected], or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.

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Space launches and an old leaky dam: Down in Alabama

Up, up and Away

It won’t be long until commercial space launches become more frequent than some people leaving the house.

The Federal Aviation Administration released a new report with launch statistics, and AL.com’s John R. Roby reports that, in 2024, space launches hit an all-time high. Which you may have expected. But you might not be aware of these numbers: There were 142 operations throughout the year by seven companies. Most launches are for satellite deployments.

The agency believes that the U.S. could be sending up more than a launch a day by the year 2034.

As goes the space industry, so goes North Alabama, the home of manufacturing and integration operations for United Launch Alliance and Blue Origin, which both sent payloads into orbit just last month.

Of those 142 launches in 2024, 118 were performed by SpaceX. Blue Origin had three launches and ULA had two.

Restarting repair work

Birmingham’s water board voted to restart work on the leaky Lake Purdy Dam, just a few days after stopping it, reports AL.com’s Joseph D. Bryant.

The decision to forge ahead came in response to some pretty blunt risk assessment. The U.S. Army Corps of Engineers classified it as high hazard based on the danger of a breach.

Last week, Arcadia engineer Patrick Flannelly told the board that a dam failure would affect thousands of home and possibly kill people.

The first phase of the project will cost $28 million. Indeed, the cost issue is what led to pausing the project.

Alabama’s got talent

The Birmingham Youth & Young Adult Fellowship Choir became one of 10 acts to receive a Golden Buzzer on “America’s Got Talent,” reports AL.com’s Patrick Darrington.

That means the act impressed one judge so much that it passes right into the live round without being facing all the judges.

The choir received the Golden Buzzer from judge Simon Cowell.

The group formed in 2015. It knocked out Cowell with a rendition of “Joyful, Joyful Lord We Adore Thee” infused with some hip hop.

A lot of toilet paper

Former NFL quarterback Eli Manning was in Auburn on Tuesday for an event billed as the setting of a new Guinness World Record, according to the Auburn Plainsman and other news outlets.

Whether or not it passes the Guinness folks to be a legitimate record, reports indicate that a crowd of hundreds tossed thousands of rolls of toilet paper into the tree limbs.

The Montgomery Advertiser reports that professor Keith S. Hébert presented Manning with a plaque from Gov. Kay Ivey. He announced that a record number of 7,125 rolls of TP were chucked into two trees and that it was a world record.

The reason behind staging such a rolling of Toomer’s Corner? Manning was featuring the Auburn tradition for his ESPN show, “Eli’s Places.”

Quoting

“The Texas floods were caused by natural weather dynamics—not human interference or weather modification efforts. It was not caused by Democrats or Republicans.”

More Alabama News

Born on This Date

In 1955, former Major League Baseball player Willie Wilson of Montgomery.

The podcast

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Miss Manners: My parents threw me a housewarming party I didn’t want

DEAR MISS MANNERS: My parents decided to throw us a housewarming party — the day after we moved our family of five into a new home. They invited some people around town who’d known me as a kid. They also invited my friends, and then asked them to invite more people. And they brought their own snacks.

We had been cleaning the apartment we had moved out of, and still needed to put up curtains and assemble beds in the new place. The guests were polite, but did not help us unpack, except for my brother, who helped me with my daughter’s bed. Was there a polite way I could have asked these unexpected guests to leave so we could continue working?

GENTLE READER: Trying to explain to guests that, while it is true they were invited to your new home, you are not responsible for making them feel welcome because you were unaware an invitation had been sent is a bit like trying to explain to the police that, although you admit to driving the getaway car, you had no idea your friend intended to rob the bank.

Your audience will be skeptical — if not outright hostile — and you cannot rely on the people who know the truth to back up your story.

Miss Manners says this to encourage you to pay greater attention to your parents’ plans in the future, in case you missed an earlier opportunity to squelch this one. By the time everyone had arrived, the most you could do politely was look so tired and overwhelmed that the guests decamped voluntarily — or pitched in.

Please send your questions to Miss Manners at missmanners.com, by email to [email protected], or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.

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Dear Annie: My son used to love soccer, but now he dreads practice because of my husband

Dear Annie: My husband has been coaching our 8-year-old son’s soccer team this season. At first, I thought it would be a great bonding experience for them. Our son is an active, sweet kid who used to spend hours in the yard practicing his kicks and counting down the days until the next game. But now, that excitement is gone — and I think I know why.

My husband is a very intense coach. He shouts directions from the sidelines and gets visibly frustrated when the boys mess up, and after every game, he breaks down what went wrong play by play. He even critiques our son in the car ride home. He says he’s “just being honest” and that kids need to learn discipline. But I’ve seen our son’s confidence drop. He’s gone from loving soccer to asking if he can skip practice.

He told me last week, “I don’t think I’m good at soccer anymore. Dad gets mad when I mess up.” My heart broke hearing that. This is supposed to be a recreational league — a place for kids to have fun, learn and grow — but it’s become high-stress under my husband’s watch.

I’ve tried to talk to him about backing off a little, but he gets defensive. He says the boys need structure and that he’s trying to prepare them to succeed in life. I understand his intentions, but I’m worried his style is doing more harm than good.

How do I help him see that his approach may be crushing our son’s spirit — without turning this into a bigger conflict between us? — Sideline Mom With a Heavy Heart

Dear Heavy Heart: Your concerns are valid, and your instincts as a mother are spot-on. At 8 years old, kids should be playing sports because they enjoy them — not because they’re afraid of disappointing their coach, especially when that coach is also their dad.

Your husband may believe he’s helping by pushing the team to be better, but what he may not realize is that his approach could be discouraging the very child he wants to inspire. When a child who once loved soccer starts wanting to quit, that’s a sign something is off.

I encourage you to talk to your husband again, but this time from a place of shared love for your son. Show him this letter. Let him know you admire his dedication, but remind him that building confidence and joy in the game is more important than winning. Sometimes the most valuable lessons in sports aren’t about performance; they’re about resilience, teamwork and simply having fun.

Keep standing up for your son’s emotional well-being. He’s lucky to have a mom who sees the big picture.

Read more Dear Annie and other advice columns.

“How Can I Forgive My Cheating Partner?” is out now! Annie Lane’s second anthology — featuring favorite columns on marriage, infidelity, communication and reconciliation — is available as a paperback and e-book. Visit Creators Publishing for more information. Send your questions for Annie Lane to [email protected].

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Today’s daily horoscopes: July 9, 2025

We’re in the beginning of a Uranus transit, the middle of a solar journey and on the cusp of the full moon. Like the deer growing new antlers — velvety, tender and quickly branching — life has a potent, rising energy. Something is taking shape, even if it’s still soft and unfinished. What’s your Buck Moon premonition? Maybe it’s not a full vision, but a feeling you can almost name — sharp at the edges, still warm in the center.

ARIES (March 21-April 19). You’ve learned when to push and when to pause, and you have your finger on the button today. Guided by excellent inner timing, one tap starts a chain reaction. Trust yourself and let momentum carry you.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20). You’ll notice what’s not being said — and it matters more than what is. There’s an opening here to ask a question no one else is asking. Your curiosity makes others feel seen and shifts the whole mood.

GEMINI (May 21-June 21). There are those who give you just enough to keep your antennae up, tuned to the station of them. They send a familiar signal, faint but undeniably present. The chances of connection are real enough for you to wonder and slim enough to keep you spinning.

CANCER (June 22-July 22). There’s a scene you don’t want to play out again. Start there. Eliminate the unwanted and let what remains inspire a new kind of moment — honest, strange, beautiful or maybe all three. You deserve this loveliness.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). You’ll get further by letting your instincts lead. Instead of weighing every decision, simply move where you’re needed. Focused generosity brings out your signature flair without forcing a single style choice.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). What looks like simplicity is actually an intricate feat of alignment. Pause to marvel at how many unseen elements had to cooperate for things to go smoothly. That awareness changes how you walk through the day.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). Telling your story to a new audience unlocks a surprising twist. You’ll see your own life differently through their eyes, and the themes that rise up will point you to your next project, your next truth.

SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). You’re on a roll. Ideas keep bubbling. Don’t worry about the duds — they’ll fall away as you tend to the obvious winners. You don’t settle, and that’s what elevates you. Keep refining until it shines.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). It starts with one clear sentence, maybe two. You say what needs saying, and it unlocks the next development. Others have been thinking the same but weren’t brave enough to voice it. You’re transforming the atmosphere with your talk.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). Your time is sacred. You knew this when you signed up to help, but this thing snowballed into more than expected. Still, you’ve learned something vital: you get to renegotiate. In drawing a boundary, there’s no shame — only wisdom.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). That wild spark inside doesn’t need a reason. Sometimes, rebellion is its own reward. Change the vibe, break a rule, wear something that screams. You’re rewriting your aesthetic — and it’s working. Your world takes on new heat.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). A feeling you couldn’t quite name is starting to take shape. Now that it has edges, you can do something with it — turn it into art, a conversation or your new rules. The moment you act, clarity flows in — after, not before.

TODAY’S BIRTHDAY (July 9). You’re tapped into the magic of timing this year. You’ll walk into the right place at the right moment on a regular basis, at least once a week. More highlights: Relationships deepen, even those you thought had reached their limit. You’ll be trusted with something sacred, and your care will be remembered. Your unusual work that’s been hard to place now gets the spotlight and the payment it deserves. Sagittarius and Scorpio adore you. Your lucky numbers are: 7, 11, 20, 38 and 44.

CELEBRITY PROFILES: Beloved everyman and two-time Oscar winner Tom Hanks is a Cancer through and through, radiating the compassion, emotional authenticity and enduring warmth the moonchildren are known for. His ability to anchor a story with heart and humanity has made him one of Hollywood’s most trusted leads for decades. Though a fixture in film, Hanks has also turned his talents toward producing and publishing, continuing to shape culture from behind the scenes.

Holiday Mathis’ debut novel, “How To Fail Epically in Hollywood,” is out now! This fast-paced romp about achieving Hollywood stardom is available as a paperback and e-book. Visit creatorspublishing.com for more information. Write Holiday Mathis at HolidayMathis.com.

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Watch a Birmingham youth choir win the Golden Buzzer on ‘America’s Got Talent’

In a truly joyful performance, the Birmingham Youth & Young Adult Fellowship Choir won a Golden Buzzer during Tuesday’s episode of ‘America’s Got Talent.’

Terry Crews, host of America’s Got Talent, posted the choir’s performance on X and congratulated the group.

The Birmingham group performed a rendition of ‘Joyful, Joyful Lord We Adore Thee’ infused with elements of hip hop.

The performance received tremendous applause from the audience and all of the judges gave a standing ovation.

Simon Cowell gave the Birmingham Youth Fellowship Choir the Golden Buzzer after thanking them for performing on the show.

”I can see and hear how much work went into this,” Cowell said.

“Every single one of you played the perfect part we had lead vocals, we had emotion. I’m so honored that you would come here on our 20th anniversary and in return I want to give you something.”

The choir’s director, Akheem Lee, said the group was started in 2015 as a way to give back to the community but it continued to grow after youth kept requesting to join the.

Lee told Cowell that the youth choir decided to audition for the show this year to demonstrate that Birmingham has talented individuals despite often being “last on the list when you think about cities in America.“

Lee said that the city has a tragic yet rich history and said that he grew up at the 16th Street Baptist Church, the church that was bombed in a 1963 white supremacy attack resulting in the death of four Black children.

“While that bombing was such a tragic situation it played such an instrumental role in bringing international attention to the civil rights struggle in America and Birmingham particularly,” Lee said.

“Sixty something years later the choir exists. So, we wanted the opportunity to show that Birmingham, Alabama has some talented young people and we want to do something great for the community.”

The choir is one of 10 acts that will be able to receive a Golden Buzzer during this season of ‘America’s Got Talent.’

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Brace for strong thunderstorms in Lauderdale and Colbert counties Tuesday evening – gusts may reach 40 mph

A weather alert was issued by the National Weather Service on Tuesday at 7:55 p.m. for strong thunderstorms until 8:30 p.m. for Lauderdale and Colbert counties.

Residents can expect wind gusts of up to 40 mph.

“At 7:55 p.m., Doppler radar tracked a strong thunderstorm 11 miles north of Cherokee, or 13 miles east of J P Coleman State Park, moving east at 20 mph,” says the weather service. “Gusty winds could knock down tree limbs and blow around unsecured objects.”

Locations impacted by the alert include Cherokee, Underwood-Petersville, Waterloo, Threet, Margerum, Riverton, Wright and Oakland.

The weather service adds, “If outdoors, consider seeking shelter inside a building. Torrential rainfall is also occurring with this storm and may lead to localized flooding. Do not drive your vehicle through flooded roadways.”

Staying safe as lightning approaches: Expert advice

Lightning strikes the United States approximately 25 million times each year, with the bulk of these electrical discharges occurring during the summer months. Tragically, lightning claims the lives of about 20 individuals annually, as reported by the weather service. The risk of lightning-related incidents escalates as thunderstorms draw near, reaching its peak when the storm directly looms overhead. However, it gradually recedes as the tempest moves away.

To protect yourself during a thunderstorm, take these recommendations into consideration:

Lightning safety plan:

  • When venturing outdoors, it’s crucial to have a lightning safety plan in place.
  • Stay vigilant by monitoring the sky for ominous signs and listening for the telltale sound of thunder. If thunder is audible, it’s a clear indication of nearby lightning.
  • Seek shelter promptly in a safe location, preferably indoors.

Indoors safety measures:

  • Once you’re indoors, avoid using corded phones, electrical devices, plumbing fixtures, and stay away from windows and doors.
  • These precautions help reduce the risk of electrical surges, as lightning can follow conductive pathways.

Wait for the all-clear:

  • After the last lightning strike or thunderclap, wait at least 30 minutes before resuming outdoor activities.
  • It’s important to remember that lightning can strike even when a storm seems to have passed, so exercise caution.

When indoor shelter isn’t available:

If you find yourself outdoors with no access to indoor shelter during a thunderstorm, take these steps to maximize your safety:

  • Avoid open fields, hilltops, or ridge crests, as they expose you to greater lightning risk.
  • Steer clear of tall, isolated trees and other prominent objects. In wooded areas, stay close to lower stands of trees.
  • If you’re with a group, ensure individuals are spread out to prevent lightning current from transferring between people.
  • Camping in an open setting during a thunderstorm is strongly discouraged. If you have no alternative, set up camp in a valley, ravine, or other low-lying areas. It’s crucial to note that a tent provides no protection against lightning.
  • Do not approach water bodies, wet objects, or metal items. While water and metal don’t attract lightning, they conduct electricity effectively and can pose significant risks.

In summary, when facing the threat of lightning, vigilance and preparedness are your best allies. By following these guidelines, you can significantly reduce the chances of lightning-related accidents and prioritize your safety.

Navigating heavy rain: Essential safety measures for wet roads

When heavy rain strikes, safety is paramount. Equip yourself with these guidelines from the weather service to navigate wet roads and avoid hazards:

Beware of rapid water flow:

Avoid parking or walking in close proximity to culverts or drainage ditches, as the swiftly moving water during heavy rain can potentially carry you away.

Maintain safe driving distances:

Use the two-second rule to maintain a safe distance from the car in front of you and allow an extra two seconds in heavy rain.

Reduce speed and drive cautiously:

If it is raining and the roads are wet, slow down. Take your foot off the accelerator and let your speed drop gradually. Never use the brakes suddenly because this may cause the car to skid.

Choose your lane wisely:

Stay toward the middle lanes – water tends to pool in the outside lanes.

Visibility matters:

Enhance your visibility in heavy rain by turning on your headlights. Watch out for vehicles in blind spots, as rain-smeared windows can obscure them.

Watch out for slippery roads:

Be extra careful during the first half hour after rain begins. Grime and oil on the road surface mix with water to make the road slippery.

Keep a safe distance from large vehicles:

Large trucks and buses can reduce your visibility with tire spray. Avoid tailgating and pass them swiftly and safely.

Mind your windshield wipers:

Heavy rain can overload the wiper blades. When visibility is so limited that the edges of the road or other vehicles cannot be seen at a safe distance, it is time to pull over and wait for the rain to ease up. It is best to stop at rest areas or other protected areas.

If the roadside is your only option, pull off as far as possible, preferably past the end of a guard rail, and wait until the storm passes. Keep your headlights on and turn on emergency flashers to alert other drivers of your position.

By following these safety measures, you can significantly reduce risks and ensure your well-being when heavy rain pours down. Stay informed about weather conditions and heed advice from local authorities to make your journey safe and sound.

Advance Local Weather Alerts is a service provided by United Robots, which uses machine learning to compile the latest data from the National Weather Service.

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