Alabama News

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I attended a concert at our church, which has an excellent endowed music program. The concert was an organ and poetry recital, about 40 minutes in duration.

About 15 minutes in, I became aware of a skritching sound that didn’t stop. I looked in the pew behind me and a woman was sitting there filing her nails with an emery board. I tried to get her attention but she would not look at me. I reached back and tapped her knee, which startled her and made her angry. I asked her to please stop filing her nails, which she did. At the end of the concert, she asked my name and informed me that if I ever touched her again, she would call the police and press charges on me for assault. I said “please do.” She had already ruined the event for me. She made a commotion as she left, which was noticed by others.

Should I have done something different?

GENTLE READER: Tapped her on the shoulder, not the knee.

No, wait. You should not be touching strangers at all, unless you are rescuing them from imminent danger. Besides, it would be difficult to reach a shoulder in the pew behind you.

And it is difficult, Miss Manners admits, to reach a determined scofflaw. If no church authority was available during the incident, it might still be worth reporting in the hope that efforts will be made to restore proper behavior.

Please send your questions to Miss Manners at missmanners.com, by email to [email protected], or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.

The city of Jackson sits on the east bank of the Tombigbee River in Clarke County and is home to only 1,112 families, according to the latest U.S. census.

Class 4A Jackson High School has 420 students in grades 9-12. Simple math says that’s 105 students per grade, with roughly 53 of those being boys.

Then how is it possible that four of the 15 players on AL.com’s A-List ranking of the best senior football prospects in the state are all from this one small town?

It’s because the state champion Aggies are experiencing an influx of talent that per capita might be the most impressive in state history. They could have as many as 12 players sign major scholarships this year.

“It’s an unbelievable class,” Jackson coach Cody Flournoy said. “When you’re a high school football coach, this is a class you dream of. It’s not like we just put this team together. I’ve been here six years, and these are the same guys we watched playing pee wee ball together when I got here. It’s a credit to Jackson. These guys’ dads and granddads played for Jackson. Their moms cheered for Jackson. These are our kids who grew up here.”

The Jackson contingent on the A-List is led by running back EJ Crowell (pronounced CROW-ell), who reclassified from the Class of 2027 and has already committed to Alabama. Crowell rushed for 1,964 yards and 31 touchdowns on 168 carries last season in helping the Aggies to 14 straight wins after a season-opening loss to Saraland.

“Alabama is Alabama,” Crowell said on the day of his commitment ceremony. “Since growing up, I’ve been watching them and felt like I wanted to be a part of it. I got the offer my freshman year and really knew I was going there. It’s just a dream come true, committing to the University of Alabama. I’m just living out my dream.”

Nine members of the A-List have already committed to play in the SEC. Of the other six, two are committed to North Carolina and one is committed to Duke, while the other three are expected to sign with an SEC or Big Ten team.

Three of the players are committed to Alabama and two are pledged to North Carolina, while Florida, Georgia, Auburn, LSU, Texas, Arkansas and Duke have one each.

Here is AL.com’s A-List of the best Class of 2026 high school football prospects. Each player will be featured in August leading up to the first games of the season Aug. 21 and 22. The list also will be re-evaluated on several occasions during and after the season.

15. Jamarrion Gordon, Jackson, CB, North Carolina

Gordon, who was once committed to Alabama, became one of the first players to commit to legendary coach Bill Belichick at North Carolina.

14. DeShawn Spencer, Saraland, WR, Duke

Don’t be surprised if Auburn tries to make a late push for the star receiver from one of the state’s powerhouse high school programs.

13. JJ Bush, Theodore, LB, Arkansas

Bush has proven to be productive at running back, quarterback, defensive back and edge rusher but his future is as a linebacker.

12. Vodney Cleveland, Parker, DL, Texas

Cleveland, who was committed to Alabama as a junior, was a key member of the historic Parker state championship team last season.

11. Keeyun Chapman, Jackson, WR, North Carolina

The 6-foot-4 Chapman is a nightmare for defensive backs on jump ball throws. His brother Keagan, a defensive back, is also committed to North Carolina.

10. Dylan Purter, Booker T. Washington-Tuskegee, CB, LSU

Purter has the cover skills to play cornerback but his ball-hawking ability makes him a strong candidate to play safety.

9. Shadarius Toodle, Cottage Hill Christian-Mobile, LB, Georgia

At 6-foot-3 and projected to be more than 230 pounds, Toodle is an ideal sideline-to-sideline linebacker.

8. Hezekiah Harris, Mae Jemison-Huntsville, LB, Auburn

A 6-foot-5 edge rusher, Harris is the highest-rated recruit in Auburn’s 2026 class.

7. Zyan Gibson, Gadsden City, CB, Alabama

Gibson was one of the first commits to Alabama in the Class of 2026. He has the skills to be a true man-to-man cornerback.

6. Jaquez Wilkes, Wadley, LB, Undecided

At 6-foot-4, Wilkes stands above the crowd playing for Class 1A state champion Wadley. He has strong family ties to nearby Auburn.

5. Landon Duckworth, Jackson, QB, Undecided

Duckworth has led Jackson to state championships in football and basketball as well as being part of a state-champion relay team. He was an early commit to South Carolina, and the Gamecocks appear to be the favorites to earn his signature.

4. Marquez Daniel, Booker T. Washington-Tuskegee, WR, Florida

Daniel is often overshadowed by 5-star prospect CD Morgan at nearby Benjamin Russell, but his skills are not secondary to anyone. At 6-foot-5, Daniel is adept at making contested catches.

3. CD Morgan, Benjamin Russell-Alexander City, WR, Alabama

Morgan is regarded by most recruiting services as one of the top two receivers in the country. He comes from the same high school program that produced Hall of Fame receiver Terrell Owens and current Auburn receiver Malcolm Simmons.

2. Tank Jones, St. Paul’s-Mobile, DE, Undecided

Jones is among the top uncommitted players in the country. He could easily be a star at tight end, running back, linebacker or defensive tackle. For now, he’s projected as an edge rusher. Alabama, Texas A&M and Oregon are his finalists.

1. EJ Crowell, Jackson RB, Alabama

Crowell possesses a combination of speed and power that makes him a home run threat as well as a between-the-tackles bruiser.

https://www.al.com/highschoolsports/2025/06/jackson-5-star-rb-ezavier-ej-crowell-commits-to-alabama.html

AL.com is continuing its series of highlighting some of the most unbreakable records in AHSAA history, this week with some historic numbers in boys basketball.

Fans will also have the opportunity to take their pick for most unbreakable record.

In last week’s girls basketball poll, fans chose former Woodland star Courtney Strain’s record for most points in a single season with 1,261 as the most unbreakable in AHSAA girls basketball history.

Voting for this week will close on Friday. Cast yours at the poll below.

Here are some of our picks for the most unbreakable records in AHSAA boys basketball history:

Career blocks

1,322: William Lee, Dallas County, 2011-14

According to the National Federation of State High School record book, Lee’s career blocks mark is a national record and one of only two players with over 1,000 career blocks; California native and former University of Arkansas star Darnell Robinson finished with 1,187.

He also finished the 2012-13 season with a state-record 505 blocks and also holds the NFHS record for most blocks in a game with 26 in the 2011-12 season. After claiming Mr. Basketball honors in 2014, he went on to have a standout collegiate career at UAB, where he was a two-time Conference USA Defensive Player of the Year.

Points scored in a game

97: Walter Garrett, West End (97), 1962-63 vs. Glenn (54), 1962-63 (39 FG, 19 FT)

This record, which has stood for over 50 years, remains untouched since the historic game in which Garrett scored every point for West End. He would go on to play at Birmingham-Southern College and was one of the inaugural inductees in the Alabama Sports Officials Hall of Fame.

J.F. Shields’ John Drew has the second- and third-most points in a game, with 77 and 74, both achieved against the Snow Hill Institute during the 1971-72 season. There are five 70-point games in the AHSAA record book, with Red Level’s Javen Poindexter scoring 73 against Pleasant Home in 2024.

Career field goals attempted

1,127: Jeremy Monceaux, Parkway Christian, 1999-00

Now the head boys basketball coach at Hewitt-Trussville, this mark for Monceaux is 278 more than the second-place entry in the AHSAA record book. Former Lindsay Lane star Tommy Murr finished the 2017-18 season with 849 field goals as the second-place entry. Kameron Woods of Pinson Valley finished with 817 in the 2019-20 season.

Monceaux also ranks second in AHSAA history for career points (4,555), career scoring average (36.7 points per game) and career 3-pointers attempted (1,217). He would go on to play at Liberty from 2002-06 and was a part of the team that played in the 2004 NCAA tournament. He has also been the head coach at Clay-Chalkville and Springville.

Free throws attempted in a game

112: DAR (77) vs. Good Hope (62), 2000-01

This matchup from the Class 3A Northeast Regional title game saw DAR advance to the state semifinals with a 68-44 win over New Hope. The Patriots would eventually fall to eventual Class 3A state champion Calhoun at the Birmingham-Jefferson Civic Center.

It is the only game in AHSAA history with at least 110 combined free throws; A 102-97 victory for East Lawrence over Hamilton in the 1997-98 season had 101 combined free throws.

3-pointers attempted in a season

514: Cale Black, Crossville, 1989-90

Black’s record still makes him the only player in the AHSAA record book to attempt 500 3-point baskets in a season; former Lindsay Lane star Tommy Murr ranks second with 410 attempted in the 2019-2020 season.

His mark also ranks second in the nation according to the National Federation of State High School record book. Black’s 166 made 3-pointers that season also ranks second in single-season history; he attempted 24 shots from beyond the arc against Collinsville, which is tied for fifth in a single game.

Career free throws made

1,127: Tommy Murr, Lindsay Lane, 2014-20

One of the state’s most recent stars that scatter the record books, nobody has come close to Murr’s monster mark of career free throws made. He attempted 1,313 career free throws, good for a career 85.8% free-throw percentage across his career. Murr also holds records for most points in a season (1,506), most career points (5,716), career field goals made (1,638) and career 3-pointers attempted (1,250), among others.

Signed with Lipscomb out of high school, he played in 70 games across three seasons in Nashville before transferring to UAH. He played in 65 games with the Chargers and was named Gulf South Conference Player of the Year and the 2025 Alabama Sports Writers Association Small College Athlete of the Year during his final collegiate season after averaging 20.8 points, 5.7 assists and 4.3 rebounds in the 2024-25 season.

Career assists

1,361: Bart Hyche, Winfield, 1990-94

The former Winfield star’s record still stands, completing the mark in 102 games with the Pirates from 1990-94. He is one of four players in the record books with 1,000 assists, joining Eric Nix of Ider (1,098), Jamie Pruett of North Sand Mountain (1,076) and Jeremy Monceaux of Parkway Christian (1,035). Hyche is also one of four players in the records with a 20-assist game and had 326 in the 1992-92 season, which ranks fifth for single-season assists.

A two-time Class 3A Player of the Year and Alabama Sports Writers Association Super 5 member, he helped lead Winfield to a pair of AHSAA state finals appearances and a 96-6 record during his final three seasons; he went on to play at Mississippi State. Hyche now assists in coverage of the AHSAA State Finals.

If you can’t see the survey above, click here to cast your vote.

Alabamians are connected to well-known films in many ways but did you know famous films such as “Grease” and “Everything Everywhere All at Once,” were written by people from our state?

In some cases, authors of books on which movies are based also wrote the film’s screenplay. Still other films were entirely original screenplays written by Alabamians.

Here’s a look at some of the most popular films for which Alabamians had writing credits (in chronological order). Which ones would you add? Email [email protected].

The Bad Seed, 1956

Mobile native William March wrote the novel on which the film “The Bad Seed” is based.

The Innocents, 1961

Truman Capote was born in New Orleans but spent much of his childhood living in Monroeville, Ala. Few people realize the bestselling author of “In Cold Blood” and “Breakfast at Tiffany’s” co-wrote the screenplay for a cult-classic horror film. “The Innocents,” a 1961 black-and-white based on the Henry James novella, “The Turn of the Screw.”

To Kill a Mockingbird, 1962

Monroeville native Harper Lee wrote the source novel for “To Kill a Mockingbird,” one of the best-selling books of all time.

Paper Moon, 1973

Birmingham native Joe David Brown wrote “Addie Pray” the novel on which the film “Paper Moon” is based.

Black Christmas, 1974

Written by Bob Clark, who was born in New Orleans and raised in Birmingham, “Black Christmas” is considered by film historians to be the start of the slasher era that brought us “Friday the 13th” and “Halloween.”

Logan’s Run, 1976

“Logan’s Run” was written by George Clayton Johnson, who was born in Wyoming but attended Auburn University in Alabama.

Grease, 1978

Alabama native Bronte Woodard wrote the screenplay for “Grease,” which was based on a Broadway show.

Porky’s, 1981

Written by Bob Clark, who was born in New Orleans and grew up in Birmingham. Clark also directed. “Porky’s” was controversial due to its raunchy humor.

A Christmas Story, 1983

Written by Bob Clark and humorist Jean Shepherd, who wrote the source material. Clark, who also directed “A Christmas Story,” was born in New Orleans and grew up in Birmingham.

Twilight Zone: The Movie, 1983

One segment of the anthology film “Twilight Zone: The Movie” was co-written by George Clayton Johnson, who was born in Wyoming but attended Auburn University in Alabama. The second segment was based on Johnson’s original teleplay from the “Twilight Zone” TV series for the episode “Kick the Can.”

Full Metal Jacket, 1987

Russellville native Gustav Hasford, who wrote the source novel for “Full Metal Jacket,” shared screenwriting credit with director Stanley Kubrick.

Beetlejuice, 1988

Enterprise native Michael McDowell co-wrote the story and screenplay for “Beetlejuice.”

Tales from the Darkside: The Movie, 1990

For the anthology film “Tales from the Darkside,” Enterprise native Michael McDowell shared screenplay and story credits with Stephen King, Arthur Conan Doyle and George A. Romero.

Fried Green Tomatoes, 1991

Birmingham native Fannie Flagg co-wrote the screenplay for “Fried Green Tomatoes,” adapted from her novel, “Fried Green Tomatoes at the Whistle Stop Cafe.”

The Nightmare Before Christmas, 1993

Enterprise native Michael McDowell shared screenwriting credit for the animated film “Nightmare Before Christmas” with Tim Burton and Caroline Thompson.

This Boy’s Life, 1993

Birmingham native Tobias Wolff wrote the novel “This Boy’s Life” on which the film is based.

Forrest Gump, 1994

This film “Forrest Gump” was based on the novel by Mobile native Winston Groom.

Thinner, 1996

Enterprise native Michael McDowell wrote the screenplay for “Thinner,” based on the Stephen King book of the same name.

Mulan, 1998

Boaz native Tim Hodge was one of a team of story writers for the animated Disney film “Mulan.”

October Sky, 1999

Huntsville resident Homer Hickham wrote the source novel for the movie “October Sky.” The book was called “Rocket Boys.”

Crazy in Alabama, 1999

Monroeville native Mark Childress wrote the screenplay for “Crazy in Alabama” and source novel of the same name.

Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me, 1999

The screenplay for the second “Austin Powers” movie was written by Vestavia Hills native Michael McCullers.

The Italian Job, 2003

Birmingham native Donna Powers co-wrote the screenplay, along with her husband, for “The Italian Job,” starring Mark Wahlberg and Charlize Theron.

Big Fish, 2003

Birmingham native Daniel Wallace wrote the source novel for “Big Fish,” directed by Tim Burton and filmed in Alabama.

Everything Everywhere All at Once, 2022

Birmingham native Daniel Scheinert wrote the screenplay for the hit film “Everything Everywhere All at Once” along with Daniel Kwan. The duo won Oscars for directing the film.

Godzilla vs. Kong: The New Empire, 2024

The 2024 film “Godzilla vs. Kong: The New Empire” was co-written by Adam Wingard, along with Simon Barrett, Terry Rossio and Jeremy Slater. Wingard was born in Oak Ridge, Tenn., in 1982 and grew up near Marion, Ala., before moving to Birmingham.

The Fountainhead, a “masterpiece of organic architecture designed by the legendary Frank Lloyd Wright,” is currently on the market for $2.5 million, according to listing agent Douglas Adams. The home is located in the Fondren neighborhood, a “vibrant mid-century community” in Jackson, Miss., Adams said.

Click through the gallery at the top of this story to see photos of the property.

Construction on the home, listed on the National Register of Historic Places, began in 1951 and was completed in 1954 when Wright was in his 80s. He died in 1959 at age 91.

Wright-designed homes occasionally come on the market, often the smaller houses he called “Usonian,” which were built to be affordable for middle-income families. He built 60 Usonian homes. One, the Rosenbaum House, is located in Florence, Ala., and is open as a museum.

Wright was known for designing original furniture to specifically fit his homes, which is typically sold with the home.

Listing details

Address: 306 Glenway Drive, Jackson, MS

Price: $2.5 million

Built: 1951

Size: 3,558 square feet, 3 bedrooms, 4 bathrooms

Lot Size: 0.97 acres

Agents: Douglas Adams and David A Smith, Crescent Sotheby’s Intl Realty in New Orleans, 504-944-3605

Adams said the Fountainhead “seamlessly integrates Wright’s iconic principles of natural harmony and innovative design” and was “designed specifically for the contours of its site, and this site generated the building’s form.”

The 3,558-square-foot home has three bedrooms, two full baths and two half baths.

“Fountainhead was built with no stud walls in the house, no sheetrock, brick, tile or paint and boasts of exquisite-exceptionally durable Heart Tidewater Red Cypress wood for the walls and ceilings,” the listing says. “The roof has the original copper sheeting.”

The home will appeal to admirers of Wright or those seeking a home that “embodies timeless beauty,” Adams said.

“Set amid lush landscaping, this property is a tranquil retreat while remaining moments from Fondren’s eclectic shops, restaurants, and cultural attractions,” the listing said.

Dear Eric: A relatively new friend has invited me to a third dinner at her home, and I do not want to attend. Her first two meals were simply not well-prepared and not good.

One meal included fish that had an unappetizing odor as she fried it and also had an unpleasant “off” taste when I tried to eat it. She also served barely warm, bland mashed potatoes and overcooked, unseasoned vegetables. No butter or sauces for anything. When I helped her clean up after the meal, I placed the leftover fish into the refrigerator. I could tell the interior was not very cold. Perhaps the fish had been sitting in the refrigerator uncooked for too long a time and was beginning to spoil.

The second meal at her home consisted of hummus that had been sitting out uncovered so long it had started to develop a crust. Also, there were crackers and plain, overcooked broccoli to eat with the hummus. I ate only a small amount at each meal, telling her I was not very hungry.

Since I have decided not to eat another meal that she has cooked, I do not know how to tell her I am not interested in a third invitation to dinner.

She has asked me to pick a date when I can come. Other than her cooking, she makes a good friend. How can I bow out gracefully from attending her home for meals?

– Lost My Appetite

Dear Appetite: You’ve painted quite a vivid picture. After reading this letter, I’m not hungry either. I can see why you don’t want to go back.

Criticizing another person’s cooking can be a tricky thing. If you think there’s something technically awry, like the temperature of her refrigerator, you can alert her – and potentially help her avoid illness. But it sounds like the bigger issue is one of … well, taste.

I do hate being avoidant, but in this case the most palatable path may be to ask for another activity other than dinner. Perhaps, it’s a movie or an outing instead. You could even reverse the invitation and have her over. If you emphasize that you’re very interested in spending time together, but you’d rather eat at home, you honor her intention without having to make an unsavory compromise.

Read more Asking Eric and other advice columns.

Send questions to R. Eric Thomas at [email protected] or P.O. Box 22474, Philadelphia, PA 19110. Follow him on Instagram and sign up for his weekly newsletter at rericthomas.com.

EDITOR’S NOTE: Every day until Aug. 29, Creg Stephenson is counting down significant numbers in Alabama football history, both in the lead-up to the 2025 football season and in commemoration of the Crimson Tide’s first national championship 100 years ago. The number could be attached to a year, a uniform number or even a football-specific statistic. We hope you enjoy.

The most-decisive Alabama bowl victory wasn’t coached by Nick Saban, Paul “Bear” Bryant or even Wallace Wade, but by Harold “Red” Drew.

The Crimson Tide set numerous school postseason records — some that still stand — in a 61-6 rout of Syracuse in the 1953 Orange Bowl. Alabama capped a 10-2 season by pummeling the hapless Orangemen before a crowd of 66,208 on New Year’s Day in Miami.

“A ‘souped-up’ University of Alabama riptide all but chased the boys from Syracuse back across the Mason-Dixon Line yesterday as they amassed the most lop-sided victory in the history of major bowl competition,” Zipp Newman wrote in the following day’s Birmingham News, using a Civil War metaphor, as was the sports-writing custom at the time. “The score: 61-6 speaks for itself.

“The boys from Tuscaloosa went into the game with the heady scent of orange blossoms but emerged four quarters later with the sweet fruits of victory after pouring on an astonishing performance of offensive football.”

Alabama had been a good, but not great team during the 1952 regular season. In addition to its nine victories, the Crimson Tide lost 20-0 at Tennessee in mid-October and 7-3 in mid-November to a Georgia Tech team that finished undefeated and ranked No. 2 in the polls behind national champion Michigan State.

But Alabama got hot down the stretch, routing a good Maryland team 27-7 in Mobile on Nov. 22 and shutting out a not-so-good Auburn team in the Iron Bowl on Nov. 29. That set up the Orange Bowl matchup with Syracuse, which was 7-2 with losses to Michigan State (48-7) and a team of former college and professional players from Bolling Field Air Force Base (13-12).

Ben Schwartzwelder’s Orangemen — making their first-ever bowl appearance — were a year away from signing future superstar Jim Brown and a half-decade from becoming a national power that would win the 1959 national championship. An Associated Press report prior to the 1953 Orange Bowl set Alabama as a two-touchdown favorite, with Schwartzwelder calling the Crimson Tide “the most powerful team I ever saw.”

The same report indicated that Syracuse “hopes to spring an upset with Pat Stark, a good-passing quarterback, and Bill Wetzel, 205-pound fullback who’s just back from driving a truck in Korea.” It was not to be, to say the least.

“I’m proud of my boys,” Drew said after the game. “They were fired up. I thought we would win. But I had no idea it would be by such a margin.

“I’m serious when I say this group of kids are the finest and greatest fighters I’ve ever coached.”

Alabama’s 61 points and 56-point margin of victory remain school bowl records. The Crimson Tide’s 586 yards of total offense has been exceeded only once, by the 621 yards against Ohio State in the 2021 College Football Playoff National Championship Game.

Among those 586 yards of offense were 300 passing, a rarity in those days. Newman, who had covered Alabama football since 1919, wrote that he couldn’t remember the last time the Crimson Tide had gained so many yards through the air in one game.

(The day ultimately proved to be a sad one in the state of Alabama, as news spread that country music superstar Hank Williams — a Butler County native who grew up in Montgomery — had died from heart failure while traveling by car to a show in Ohio. Williams, who had battled alcoholism and other health issues for years, was just 29.)

Alabama led only 7-6 after one quarter and 21-6 at halftime, but poured on 40 points in the second half. The game got so out-of-hand that All-America halfback Bobby Marlow — who had run for 950 yards during the regular season — carried the ball just 10 times for 32 yards in the Orange Bowl, scoring on a 1-yard run in the second quarter.

Starting quarterback Clell Hobson passed for 207 yards and two touchdowns, while freshman backup Bart Starr added 93 and another score. Fullback Tommy Lewis ran for 77 yards two TDs, while halfback Bobby Luna had a 38-yard touchdown run and a 27-yard scoring reception and Corky Tharp caught a 50-yard TD.

Alabama’s defense also rose to the occasion, holding Syracuse to 75 yards rushing and intercepting five passes. Hootie Ingram (the Crimson Tide’s future athletics director) had one of those interceptions and also returned a punt 80 yards for a touchdown, while Marvin Hill ran back an interception 60 yards for another score.

At one point late in the game, Alabama assistant coach Lew Bostick walked up to the bench and asked, “Is there anyone who hasn’t played?” No one answered in the affirmative.

“I couldn’t stop them,” Drew said. “This bunch just loves to play football.”

Wrote Newman, “It was about as near perfect for Alabama in a bowl game as it could possibly have been.”

Coming Wednesday: Our countdown continues with No. 52, one of Alabama’s early dual-threat quarterback superstars.

Dear Eric: I have been with my boyfriend for 14 years. We live about 15 minutes’ drive apart.

He is widowed and I’m divorced. We both have one adult son. Mine is 31 and his is 40.

I haven’t met his son or any friends/family members, though he knows mine.

My boyfriend says he had an abusive dad, and he doesn’t much like his two siblings or their families. He only has one real friend but won’t introduce us.

I asked him why once and he said he “likes his privacy.” I put it down to his idiosyncrasies but still find it odd.

We have always talked for hours on a nightly basis. Previously, he has gone quiet for a week or two at times. But now, although we haven’t had a falling out, I haven’t seen him in eight months.

I miss him and told him that, but nothing changed, we kept talking. Now I feel like I am wasting my time on someone I love, who clearly doesn’t feel the same way. I am not good at letting go, so please, what is your suggestion here? I don’t want a phone-only connection.

– Short-Distance Love

Dear Love: Something’s gotta give. If he’s happy to talk for hours every night, then he can and should spend 15 minutes of one of those hours, making the trek to your house for an in-person talk. Ask for that. If he can’t or won’t do it, it doesn’t mean he doesn’t love you, but it may mean that he’s not in a position to be who you need right now.

That said, multiple things can be true here. Your boyfriend has communicated – perhaps not entirely effectively – his boundaries and the traumas from which they stem. Sometimes when boundaries are communicated, they can sound like rejections even if they’re not.

It’s concerning that, after 14 years, you haven’t met his son or his sole friend. There are some indicators that he’s dealing with heavy stuff – the past abuse, going quiet for a time. He may be happiest letting the relationship he has with you flourish away from other, more complicated relationships. But he’s not doing a great job integrating his coping mechanisms into his love life. That can be hard, but it’s not insurmountable. A loving relationship needs care, empathy, compromise and understanding in order to survive. So, if you’re not getting that, or not getting it in the way you want, it may be healthiest for you to choose separation.

Read more Asking Eric and other advice columns.

Send questions to R. Eric Thomas at [email protected] or P.O. Box 22474, Philadelphia, PA 19110. Follow him on Instagram and sign up for his weekly newsletter at rericthomas.com.

LeAnn Rimes recently opened up about her affair with now-husband Eddie Cibrian.

Rimes, 42, and Cibrian, 52, were married in 2011 after meeting three years earlier on the set of the Lifetime movie “Northern Lights.”

The “Can’t Fight the Moonlight” singer told “Flow Space” she was the target of hate as a result.

“I realized very quickly that there are a lot of women who’ve been hurt,” Rimes said. “Like, I’ve been on both sides of that coin — I’ve been cheated on, too, so I know that feeling. But so many women don’t know what to do with that anger… I was a target that was just easily projected upon. And once I realized that, things got a lot easier.”

Cibrian was married to Brandi Glanville, while Rimes was married to Dean Sheremet at the time of the affair.

She went on to say she didn’t take the backlash “personally,” and instead reminded herself that “this is not all my pain to carry.”

“I know what I’m responsible for in the situation and making amends for that,” she said. “But you know, the world’s pain is not mine to carry, and I think that really got thrown at me for a long time.”

In 2010, Rimes told PEOPLE she considered her affair with Cibrian “one of the most selfish things that I could possibly do, in hurting someone else.”

“I take responsibility for everything I’ve done. I hate that people got hurt, but I don’t regret the outcome,” she said.

Mark Heim is a reporter for The Alabama Media Group. Follow him on Twitter @Mark_Heim. He can be heard on “The Opening Kickoff” on WNSP-FM 105.5 FM in Mobile or on the free Sound of Mobile App from 6 to 9 a.m. daily.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am a gentleman who strives to live a mannerly life. In that regard, when riding public transportation, I offer my seat to ladies who are standing. I also wait for ladies to leave an elevator before me.

Now that I am well beyond retirement age, does that change any expectations and norms? When, if ever, do I keep my seat and allow younger men the privilege of offering their seat to the fairer sex?

GENTLE READER: First, please get off those elevators when you are in front, instead of creating confusion by trying to stand back in favor of any ladies who are behind you. “Ladies first” never applied there.

For your habit of yielding seats, Miss Manners commends you, and hopes that ladies always treat the gesture graciously, whether or not they accept.

But it is not only your age that has changed; our system of precedence is in flux. Gender is becoming less of a factor, as it can do damage in the workplace, where deferring to colleagues as ladies undermines their professional identities. There, precedence should be determined by the job’s hierarchy.

And in society at large, age is becoming more of a factor. Should a young lady offer you a seat, Miss Manners hopes you will also respond graciously.

This is not to say that the gentlemanliness you practice should be abandoned — much less condemned, as is done by some. Tradition has its place, and these gestures add grace to society.

So the short answer is: Keep offering seats to ladies if you don’t mind standing; if you do mind, then stay seated.

Please send your questions to Miss Manners at missmanners.com, by email to [email protected], or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.