General News

General

Asking Eric: Spouse having trouble setting boundaries with family

Dear Eric: I’ve been with my husband for almost 20 years. After my last trip to see his family (where one of his siblings had a screaming/cursing meltdown in our hotel lobby), I said I was done spending thousands of dollars for travel to people who clearly didn’t appreciate it. He agreed. For the last five years he’s been flying to see his family solo. I’ve been staying home with the pup quite happily.

One of his half-siblings is getting married. Husband would like to renegotiate our prior agreement as he says he needs support to even be around his own family for this “can’t miss occasion.” Over the last two decades, these in-laws have been horrible toward me for simply being an outsider.

We both have complicated familial history and have individual therapists. I want to support my spouse, but not to the detriment of my own mental health. I quite literally had to ask if security would be present because of all the bad blood that will be in the same room (bad blood that was present before I came along). I loathe the thought of having to be around these people. I want to be a good partner, but I also realize this trip will be beyond miserable for me. How do I make myself and everyone else happy? Or do I have a husband problem?

– Should I Stay or Should I Go

Dear Go: Short answers: stay home; husband has a family problem, which is not yours to fix.

I’m curious what makes this trip so different that he feels he needs you there. That’s worth talking to him about, if for no other reason than context. Maybe he doesn’t really want/need to go, either. But that’s his decision to make, knowing that the fallout might be worse than the visit.

Talk to him about what he expects will happen and how he can get what he needs without your attendance. This may look like him staying someplace else, even if the family doesn’t want him to, or flying in only for the day of the event. Help him think through ways that he can feel empowered, despite the toxic dynamic.

Sometimes being a good partner means putting on formal attire and gritting one’s teeth through caustic toasts. But at other times, the most supportive thing to do is to help one’s spouse figure out ways to help themselves and return home as happy as possible.

Read more Asking Eric and other advice columns.

Send questions to R. Eric Thomas at [email protected] or P.O. Box 22474, Philadelphia, PA 19110. Follow him on Instagram and sign up for his weekly newsletter at rericthomas.com.

Read More
General

Asking Eric: Older couple only invited when gift is expected

Dear Eric: My spouse and I are an older couple with some family members who live in the same town as us and some family who live out of state.

The families who live near us only invite us to functions where a gift is needed, such as weddings and birthdays, etc.

We feel very sad about this since we spend many holidays alone. May I add that my spouse and I are pleasant people and so are they, but they never reach out to us except when they send an invitation for a function. We are perplexed by this. What can we do?

– Heartbroken

Dear Heartbroken: It might seem bold, but you may have to invite yourself to a holiday dinner. Sometimes, even those who love us and want to be around us don’t think of us as much as we’d like. This is normal; everyone is the star of their own show. So, it’s helpful to reach out and let people know when we have a need or a want.

Your family could assume that you already have holiday plans or that you’re happy to spend holidays solo. Try not to ascribe a pattern to the invitations you’re getting. Yes, they all involve gifts, but weddings and birthdays fall into the “celebration” category of event. One throws a party; one invites a big group to celebrate en masse. Holidays can fall into this category, too. But more often they fall into the “tradition” category. By letting your family know that you’d like to be invited, you give them – and yourselves – a chance to make a new tradition.

Read more Asking Eric and other advice columns.

Send questions to R. Eric Thomas at [email protected] or P.O. Box 22474, Philadelphia, PA 19110. Follow him on Instagram and sign up for his weekly newsletter at rericthomas.com.

Read More
General

China counters with tariffs on US products. It will also investigate Google

BEIJING (AP) — China’s Ministry of Commerce announced Tuesday it was implementing counter tariffs against the U.S. on multiple products, while announcing other trade-related measures, including an investigation into Google.

The government said it would implement 15% tariff on coal and liquified natural gas products, as well as a 10% tariff on crude oil, agricultural machinery, large-displacement cars.

“The US’s unilateral tariff increase seriously violates the rules of the World Trade Organization,” the statement said. ”It is not only unhelpful in solving its own problems, but also damages normal economic and trade cooperation between China and the US.”

The 10% tariff that President Donald Trump ordered on China was set to go into effect Tuesday, though Trump planned to talk with Chinese President Xi Jinping in the next few days.

China’s State Administration for Market Regulation on Tuesday said it is investigating Google on suspicion of violating antitrust laws. While the announcement did not specifically mention any tariffs, the announcement came just minutes after Trump’s 10% tariffs were to take effect.

by the Associated Press

Read More
General

Today’s daily horoscopes: Feb. 4, 2025

It is possible to collaborate with entities that cannot or will not help you. This type of one-sided collaboration involves observing, understanding and respecting the rules. A paradox: As we honor and study fickle forces, such as nature or time, they will seem less indifferent — and in some way, we may even appear to earn their favor.

ARIES (March 21-April 19). Meetings carry a strange sense of inevitability. Fleeting connections — a glance, a laugh, a few words — will plant a seed. Over time, it reshapes your story, weaving new threads and opening doors to places you were always meant to find.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20). You’ll make a move that feels right to you, even if you can’t put your finger on why you’re doing it. Intuition guides you illogically or perhaps absolutely. Even if you take your hands off the wheel, you won’t steer wrong.

GEMINI (May 21-June 21). Consider all possible paths, conventional and unconventional alike. Even though you want a pretty big change, the most direct route to the transformation may be as small as tweaking one habit.

CANCER (June 22-July 22). Clear up misunderstandings while they are small. A little directness and a lot of tact will go a long way toward preventing hurt feelings. You might not agree about an issue, but you’ll keep it from getting worse.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). Having specific preferences makes you unique, but it also limits your options. You’ll decide whether to add more conditions and narrow your choices, or loosen the constraints and open yourself up to new possibilities.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). Wherever you go, you want it to be better because you were there. To you, it’s not a goal but a responsibility. You recognize your influence, and with it comes a chance to promote the values you hold dear.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). Loosen your views. Let it go fuzzy. What if reality isn’t what you think it is? Fanciful play, possibility and hope are necessary to the resilient soul. “Don’t part with your illusions. When they are gone you may still exist, but you have ceased to live.” — Mark Twain

SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). It’s one of those rare days when good intentions really are enough because they have an energy that will pull you through, improving all as you go. Don’t overthink it. Just move. Your purpose will be the plan.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). Enthusiasm is the quality that gets you hired, promoted and befriended. People are drawn to your energy and passion, which inspire trust and excitement. Keep showing up with that spark, and doors you didn’t even know existed swing open.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). Get back to basics. Tend to foundations. It’s amazing what vitality is released when you simply commit to hydration, nourishment and sleep. Physical vitality enables the creativity and emotional depth you cherish.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). You prioritize people above all else — before the agenda, the results or the financial end. Your “people first” mindset means you take a little more time to get things done, but you have a lot more fun along the way.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). If you find yourself pretty deep into a task before you realize it is not worth your time or attention, give yourself credit for figuring that out at all. You’ll fulfill your obligation and then plan to avoid similar low-yield endeavors in the future.

TODAY’S BIRTHDAY (Feb. 4). Your problem-solving abilities are nothing short of astounding and will have far-reaching positive effects. Much will depend on where you focus this. Avoid being overly serious about it. Do what’s fun for you in this year filled with friends and novel adventures. More highlights: You’ll be heralded for your attitude, celebrated for your heart and hired for your financial savvy. Gemini and Capricorn adore you. Your lucky numbers are: 6, 10, 35, 31 and 16.

CELEBRITY PROFILES: Oscar De La Hoya remains a trailblazer as the first American of Mexican descent to own a national boxing promotional firm. Known as “The Golden Boy,” De La Hoya embodies the Aquarian spirit of community and innovation, channeling his success in the ring into opportunities for others. True to his sign, he openly shares both his victories and his challenges, believing that transparency can inspire and uplift. De La Hoya has recently focused on expanding Golden Boy Promotions, diversifying its roster of talent and spotlighting rising stars in the sport. His memoir and media appearances continue to resonate with audiences.

Holiday Mathis’ debut novel, “How To Fail Epically in Hollywood,” is out now! This fast-paced romp about achieving Hollywood stardom is available as a paperback and e-book. Visit creatorspublishing.com for more information. Write Holiday Mathis at HolidayMathis.com.

Read More
General

Dense fog advisory affecting Southwest Alabama Tuesday

The National Weather Service issued a dense fog advisory at 10:51 p.m. on Monday valid for Tuesday between midnight and 10 a.m. for Washington, Clarke, Monroe, Conecuh, Escambia, Covington, Mobile and Baldwin counties.

The weather service states, “Visibility one quarter mile or less in dense fog.”

“Low visibility could make driving conditions hazardous,” adds the weather service. “If driving, slow down, use your headlights, and leave plenty of distance ahead of you.”

Navigating fog: Safety tips by the weather service

If a dense fog advisory is issued for your area, it means that widespread dense fog has developed and visibility often drops to just a quarter-mile or less. These conditions can make driving challenging, so exercise extreme caution on the road, and if possible, consider delaying your trip.

If driving through fog becomes inevitable, remember these safety guidelines:

Reduce speed:

Slow down and allocate extra time for your trip to reach your destination safely.

Visibility matters:

Ensure your vehicle is visible to others by using low-beam headlights, which also activate your taillights. If you have fog lights, use them.

Avoid high-beams:

Refrain from using high-beam headlights, as they create glare that impairs your visibility on the road.

Maintain safe gaps:

Leave a safe distance between you and the vehicle in front of you to account for sudden stops or changes in the traffic pattern.

Stay in your lane:

Use the road’s lane markings as a guide to remaining in the correct lane.

Visibility near zero:

In cases of near-zero visibility due to dense fog, initiate your hazard lights and locate a secure spot, such as a nearby business parking area, to pull over and come to a halt.

No parking options:

If no designated parking area is available, pull your vehicle as far off the road as possible. Once stationary, deactivate all lights except the hazard flashers, engage the emergency brake, and release the brake pedal to ensure your tail lights remain unlit, minimizing the chance of other drivers colliding with your stationary vehicle.

By adhering to these recommendations from the weather service, you can navigate foggy conditions more safely, reducing the risk of accidents and ensuring your well-being.

Advance Local Weather Alerts is a service provided by United Robots, which uses machine learning to compile the latest data from the National Weather Service.

Read More
General

What Super Bowl quarterback Jalen Hurts learned from Alabama coach Nick Saban

Jalen Hurts’ one hour of fielding questions from media members at Super Bowl Opening Night in New Orleans on Monday included one “Roll Tide” from the Philadelphia Eagles quarterback.

Hurts also said something that he learned at Alabama while playing for coach Nick Saban had helped him find success on his football journey.

“I got this from coach Saban,” Hurts said. “I think one thing he taught us all – and he taught us all, but not everyone listened. I was one that listened. He taught us that every year is a new season, and it’s an opportunity to restart everything, so you start from the ground up. And you have to have that approach. I think just being able to improve from year to year since my freshman year at college and learn from all my experiences, learn from all of my lessons.

“Being able to stand here where I stand today, I think it’s because of that mentality — being determined, having that endurance to keep going and being diligent with the work. The No. 1 thing that I’ve always wanted to do was quantify my work and make the most of those opportunities. And it’s kind of spoke for itself.”

Hurts and the Eagles are in New Orleans to play the Kansas City Chiefs in Super Bowl LIX at 5:30 p.m. CST Sunday at Caesars Superdome. FOX will televise the game.

RELATED: JALEN HURTS ENDS 33-YEAR DROUGHT WITH HALL OF FAME RESILIENCE

While Hurts might try to treat every season as a new start, they have often ended in the same place for the quarterback.

The SEC Offensive Player of the Year as a freshman, Hurts appeared to have capped an undefeated 2016 season for Alabama when he ran 30 yards for a touchdown to give the Crimson Tide a three-point lead over Clemson with 2:07 to play in the CFP national-championship game. But the Tigers took the title when Deshaun Watson threw a 2-yard TD pass to Hunter Renfrow with one second to play for a 35-31 victory.

Hurts and Alabama returned to the CFP national championship game for the 2017 season. But with the Tide trailing Georgia 13-0, Alabama changed quarterbacks at halftime, with Tua Tagovailoa replacing Hurts and pulling out a 26-23 overtime victory.

In 2018, Tagovailoa became the Tide’s starting quarterback, with Hurts as the backup. But with Tagovailoa injured, Hurts came off the bench, threw for a touchdown and ran for a touchdown in the fourth quarter to rally Alabama to a 35-28 victory over Georgia in the SEC Championship Game.

Hurts transferred to Oklahoma for the 2019 season and finished as the runner-up to LSU quarterback Joe Burrow in the Heisman Trophy balloting.

After going to the CFP in all four of his college seasons and reaching the national-championship game three times, Hurts joined the Eagles as a second-round selection in the 2020 NFL Draft.

Hurts became Philadelphia’s starting quarterback with four games remaining in his rookie season. The Eagles have reached the playoffs in all four of Hurts’ full seasons as a starter.

Hurts has helped Philadelphia reach the Super Bowl for the second time. In the 2022 season, the Eagles won the NFC championship but lost to Kansas City 38-35 in Super Bowl LVII.

FOR MORE OF AL.COM’S COVERAGE OF THE NFL, GO TO OUR NFL PAGE

Mark Inabinett is a sports reporter for Alabama Media Group. Follow him on X at @AMarkG1.

Read More
General

LeFlore, Vigor boys set for 5A, Area 2 showdown

De’Antonio Leseur scored 16 of his 20 points in the second half to lead LeFlore over Faith Academy 58-52 on Monday night at Bishop State in the Class 5A, Area 2 tournament.

The Rattlers will face Vigor in the championship game at 6:30 p.m. Wednesday. The Wolves defeated St. Paul’s in the other semifinal.

Read More
General

New Jersey governor dares ICE to raid his home to get undocumented immigrant hidden in his garage

New Jersey Gov. Phil Murphy came under fire Monday after appearing to say he was housing an undocumented immigrant in a garage above his home and daring federal officials in President Donald Trump’s administration to ”try to get her.”

But while Murphy’s office declined comment, a source familiar with the situation told NJ Advance Media the remarks were misinterpreted and the woman has never actually lived at his residence.

The unprompted remarks from Murphy, a Democrat in his final year running the state, came during a public interview Saturday at Montclair State University with left-leaning advocacy group Blue Wave New Jersey. The event was streamed on the governor’s social media.

It all comes as Trump has vowed to conduct mass deportations of undocumented immigrants and his administration has threatened to punish officials who interfere. There has been an increase in ICE raids since Trump, a Republican, began his second term last month, including one at a fish market in Newark.

Murphy was asked during Saturday’s event how his administration will respond to Trump. In a later part of the conversation — during a question about transgender rights — he recounted a discussion he had with First Lady Tammy Murphy about housing someone, apparently at their Middletown home on the Navesink River.

“This isn’t a trans case, but Tammy and I were talking about — I don’t want to get into too much detail, but there’s someone in our broader universe whose immigration status is not yet at the point they are trying to get it to,” Murphy said. “And we said: You know what? Let’s have her live above our house above our garage. And good luck to the feds coming in to try to get her.”

“We cannot roll over, we cannot stop fighting,” he added moments later.

The comments went largely unnoticed until Monday, when right-leaning media outlets published stories about them.

But the source familiar with the situation — who spoke on the condition of anonymity — said Murphy was talking about “someone in his circle of friends who was concerned given all that’s going on,” even though that person has “legal status.”

Murphy, the source said, was simply saying he would have offered her a place at the house and that the remarks were “blown out” of proportion by conservative media.

“No one’s ever lived in the home,” the source said.

Tom Holman, Trump’s border czar, said in December that knowingly harboring undocumented immigrants from ICE is a “violation of the law.” In a memo last month, the U.S. Justice Department ordered federal prosecutors to investigate state or local officials who they believe are interfering with the Trump administration’s attempts to crack down on illegal immigration and said they could face criminal charges.

Republicans criticized Murphy on Monday before the source’s explanation.

”The governor thinks he’s above the law,” State Assemblyman Erik Peterson, R-Hunterdon, said in a statement.

Some Trump supporters suggested on social media that ICE should raid Murphy’s home or that he should resign or be prosecuted.

When he first ran in 2017, Murphy, an avowed progressive Democrat, said he was open to making New Jersey a “sanctuary state” for undocumented immigrants.

In 2019, then-state Attorney General Gurbir Grewal, whom Murphy appointed, issued the Immigrant Trust Directive, which prohibits police officers, prosecutors, and corrections officers in New Jersey from participating in ICE’s civil immigration enforcement operations.

More recently, Murphy has been measured in his response to the ICE raids. Earlier in Saturday’s event, he was asked about people afraid of being deported and what the state can do.

“The formula is going to continue to be aggressive legal action, using the bully pulpit … and then having the right rules, constructs, executive orders,” Murphy said. “That tends to be the elements of the recipe.”

He then mentioned how the Immigrant Trust Directive has been “highly, highly effective,” and it has withstood a lot of federal judicial scrutiny.

“I almost feel like we’re keeping our head down here,” Murphy sad. “What we have in place has worked. Whatever we do, I don’t want to undo that.”

Murphy, who leaves office in January 2026, said in an interview with NJ Advance Media last month the state’s reaction to Trump’s immigration directives will depend on the situation.

“If they’re gonna target — apparently there’s over a million people, I believe this is throughout America, not in New Jersey — whose cases of asylum have already been adjudicated. These people have lost, but for whatever reason they’re still in the United States, if he goes after them, I don’t feel like I’m gonna be putting up a whole lot of resistance on that,” the governor said.

“If he goes after people who have committed a serious crime, who are awaiting adjudication, I don’t think there’s gonna be a lot of support in that lane either,” he added. “That’s very different from blunt-instrument mass deportation. Including very innocent individuals who escaped seeking asylum because they were being persecuted or physically threatened, or even worse yet, American citizens — that’s a problem.”

New Jersey is a left-leaning state that has one of the largest immigrant populations in the nation at 2.2 million, according to the Migration Policy Institute. About 475,000 of them entered the U.S. illegally, according to Pew Research Center estimates.

But immigration is also a tough topic for Democrats. Trump performed much better than expected in New Jersey in last year’s election, losing it by only 6 percentage points. A Rutgers-Eagleton poll last November found Garden State residents want tougher border security and a small majority favor mass deportation.

Murphy and Trump, meanwhile, have been both adversarial and friendly over the years. Murphy’s administration fought Trump’s policies on immigration, guns, and taxes in court during Trump’s first term. But they also collaborated on the government’s COVID-19 response and the Gateway Tunnel project.

During his latest State of the State address last month, Murphy said he will “never back away from partnering with the Trump administration where our priorities align.”

“But just as importantly, I will never back down from defending our New Jersey values — if and when they are tested,” the governor added.

Read More