DEAR MISS MANNERS: I was at a dinner party where the hostess, a paralegal at a local law firm, was telling us about a conversation she had in her office with one of the partners. The actual point of the story became secondary to our conversation when she set the stage with, “When he sat down, I made sure to lower my chair so that I sat lower than him.”

The other four women in the room were stunned. We pressed her on this, and she was surprised at our reaction.

I understand that you would want to be at eye level with someone during an important conversation, but physically sublimating yourself to your boss seems extreme. Is this normal office etiquette of which I am simply unaware?

GENTLE READER: Not in this country — or century. And previous centuries did not have such easily adjustable chairs.

In other cultures, bowing to lower yourself in front of someone of higher social standing (a high-status person or an elder) is considered polite. But America was founded with the idea that we are all created equal.

So unless this woman’s boss is quite literally of such low stature that he requires a seat adjustment in order to be seen at eye level, Miss Manners is inclined to share your stunned reaction.

Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, [email protected]; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.