DEAR MISS MANNERS: My massage therapist called me on the phone to cancel my appointment because she was sick. I was in the bathroom at the time, so I didn’t get to talk to her, I just heard the message.

I was disappointed, but I just proceeded with my plans for the day. Two days later, I received an email from her canceling my NEXT appointment and refunding the balance on my prepaid account.

I emailed her, asking what the deal was. She replied that since I had not called her back, and as she did not want to do business with “rude people,” she sent the refund and did not want to see me anymore.

I was flabbergasted. Since when am I required to make a phone call back when the one received was a clear message? Am I ignorant about new manners related to new technology?

I certainly did not mean to be rude, and I do not think I did anything wrong. If I am incorrect, please explain my error.

GENTLE READER: Either your massage therapist overreacted, or you underestimated the intensity of this relationship. A confirmation call and sympathy for her illness would have been kind, but not obligatory — and certainly not worthy of a lifelong ban in their absence.

Miss Manners is afraid you will have to find yourself a masseuse who is less, well, touchy.

Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, [email protected]; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.