DEAR MISS MANNERS: What is the proper way to exit a church at the end of a service? My boyfriend thinks that you must let everyone in the adjacent pew (the one closer to the doors) exit before you do. I view it more like a street intersection, but less formal, where groups of people take turns exiting. In my view, you should not try to rush, bump or push people out of the way, but you should also go with the flow and not hold people up.

My boyfriend thought I was very rude, and berated me in the parking lot, because I did not let all of the people in the next pew exit first. Instead, I followed the woman in front of me. She had invited the people in the other pew to go first, but they said no, waving her ahead. I followed her out without stopping to invite the same people to exit first.

Was I rude?

GENTLE READER: Miss Manners agrees that if someone asks people to go ahead, then the request should be obeyed, as it may mask a need for more time to disembark. You would hardly want to get into a pushing match in church with an elderly couple by insisting that you are not going anywhere until they get a move on.

Why you would want a boyfriend who berates you is another question.

Please send your questions to Miss Manners at missmanners.com, by email to [email protected], or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.