DEAR MISS MANNERS: I was asked to attend a retirement gathering. While such events are typically held for only one guest of honor, this is for two former co-workers of mine. It will be a small gathering at a local restaurant, and I plan on attending.

One of the retirees, Jenna, is a person I would like to talk to. She is so insightful, and my years working with her were always a pleasure.

Unfortunately, Jason, the other honoree, is another story. His actions became one of several reasons I left the company. Jason got paid much more than I did, yet somehow I was given some of his duties on top of my own busy workload. The problem is that I want to give Jenna a small gift, but not Jason. I know Jason’s wife will make some kind of comment about my giving only Jenna a gift. I am struggling for a polite reply if this happens.

GENTLE READER: Tell Jenna at the party how much you enjoyed working with her, and that you have a small token of appreciation you would like to mail to her later, if she would provide an address.

Miss Manners also insists that you congratulate Jason on his retirement. You can do so sincerely, as you doubtless believe that the company will be better off without him.

Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, [email protected]; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.