Love is Blind keeps Failing Black Women, and this season proves it
It’s winter cuffing season, and Netflix is setting the mood for early sunsets and cold nights. The latest season of “Love is Blind” has captured American hearts — or, at least, attempted to. The show, designed to instill a hope for true love without superficiality, has only done so for certain audiences.
This season, released on Oct. 2, followed the love stories of six couples from the pods to their weddings. Amid criticism that Black women rarely receive their fairytale ending on the show, “Love is Blind” attempted a resolution this season, with four of the six couples featuring Black women. Perhaps because the show was based in Washington, D.C., aka Chocolate City, or because the producers aimed for a more diverse cast, which deserves recognition.
What seemed like a rare success story for Black women on the show—Ashley and Tyler’s romance—has unraveled into yet another example of the franchise’s failures. While Ashley presented as a confident, accomplished Black woman seeking genuine partnership, the show’s editing concealed crucial information that might have informed her—and viewers’—decisions. The “sperm donor” revelation, initially portrayed as a communication hurdle the couple overcame, has emerged as something far more complex.
When Bri Thomas, the mother of Tyler’s three children, came forward with evidence that Tyler had been an active father—living with his children, signing birth certificates, and participating in their daily lives until shortly before filming—it exposed how the show’s pursuit of a “fairy tale” narrative potentially compromised a Black woman’s right to make fully informed choices about her future. Despite Ashley’s insistence at the Oct. 30 reunion that she “knew everything,” the controversy raises disturbing questions about how the show packages Black love stories for entertainment.
This pattern of incomplete truths and edited realities particularly impacts Black women contestants, who must navigate not just the usual challenges of finding love on camera, but also the added burden of discovering their partners’ complicated pasts after public commitment. The show’s choice to present Tyler’s parental status as a simple “sperm donor” situation, rather than exploring the nuanced reality of his co-parenting history, reflects a broader tendency to oversimplify Black relationships for television consumption.
And while Ashley’s story dominated headlines, she wasn’t alone in facing obstacles to her happy ending. The season’s other Black women contestants encountered their own struggles with transparency, commitment, and the show’s familiar pattern of disappointment.
The pattern continued with the other couples. What started out as promising communication, sensual dates, and “I love you’s” in the pods slowly turned into arguments, infidelity, uncertainty, and protective mothers (thank you, Marissa’s mom – you were actually the moment). Ultimately, only two of the six couples made it to the altar after relationship challenges: one featuring a Black woman. That’s a 25% success rate for the Black women contestants… sheesh.
Indeed, there is a lot to unpack.
The disappointments of this season are not new for Black women in the history of the show, unfortunately. The show started out promising, as we placed Lauren Speed and Cameron Hamilton’s story on a pedestal. Our good sis hadn’t had a serious relationship in almost six years prior to the show, until she met Hamilton. The two hit it off and have been winning our hearts over and over again ever since, leaving a glimmer of the love we all hope to experience in our lifetimes.
However, the following seasons failed to reach their heights. We witnessed A.D. Smith (our girl looked stunning at this season’s reunion!) and Clay Gravesande’s Black romance – or not. Clay got cold feet about committing. A.D. went on to undergo the ultimate form of public embarrassment after committing to Gravesande at the altar, just to be told no.
Similar dynamics played out in Marissa and Ramses’ relationship in this season, where he was sure about marrying Marissa, until he wasn’t. He proposed, only to call everything off citing “not heading in the same direction,” yet reassuring Marissa that he wanted to continue the relationship. Their circular discussions about commitment eventually led to separation, leaving Marissa’s mom distraught, struggling not to “punch [Ramses] in the throat,” she disclosed at the season reunion. Way to ride, mama.
The uncertainty about commitment continued this season with Monica and Stephen, who had their fair share of relationship challenges and infidelity. Though the two had no idea about one another’s appearance when they entered an interracial relationship. They were two peas in a pod, literally, until a jarring accusation of Stephen’s cheating during a “sleeping test”, when he sent sexual texts to another woman while inebriated. This left Monica heartbroken and unsure of who she was engaged to and the couple called it quits.
The violin for Black women involved in the LIB franchise extends beyond this season. Back in season five, we witnessed Aaliyah Cosby and Uche Okoroha’s seemingly perfect love story in the pods become a horrible disaster for Aaliyah. The two tried to make it work on and off the show, until Aaliyah eventually shared that Uche did not find her attractive and struggled to make the relationship work. Let me tell y’all: the two looked alike. It gives self hate, and I hate that for us. I want nothing more than for Black women to be loved out loud.
Are there Black women who have enjoyed beautiful love stories on “Love Is Blind”? Absolutely. Yet it’s hard to witness Black women struggle for love in reality AND in an experience that is meant to take away the superficialities of love: race, income, and the likes.
We need to see Black women engage in a love full of ease, love, and luxury that allows us to be our feminine, beautiful selves. We need it.
Sullivan Anderson is a recent graduate from the nation’s #1 HBCU, North Carolina A&T State University. She has a passion for all things storytelling, and she loves to spread positive messages through media. You can catch her doing #blackgirlthings in her free time!