For those whose mothers have died, Mother’s Day may mean mourning

For those whose mothers have died, Mother’s Day may mean mourning

Mother’s Day is a day to celebrate mothers, which is great, if your mother is living.

If your mother has died, it may be a time of mourning.

Those who mourn the loss of their mothers have turned to gathering together to share their communal grief this weekend.

On Saturday, May 13, a day ahead of Mother’s Day, a group of people whose mothers have died will gather at Rojo, a Birmingham restaurant at 2921 Highland Avenue. They will have brunch, listen to live jazz music, hug and share stories of mothers who are no longer with them, from 11 a.m. to 3 p.m. Participants are encouraged to bring framed pictures of their mothers.

Glenny Brock and Mia Watkins started the event in 2018, after discussing the loss of their mothers and how it affects their view of Mother’s Day. They bluntly named the event, “Dead Mother’s Day Brunch.”

They found kindred spirits.

“We had a huge turnout that first year,” Brock said. “There were so many people I didn’t know, and so many I had known for years without ever knowing their moms had died.”

They found that sharing grief eased their pain.

“The amazing thing that people kept saying to Mia and me was: ‘I’m just so relieved,’” Brock said. “We created a fine thing we had no idea so many people needed.”

Guests at past events have included those who had only a brief time with their mothers. One guest in her fifties shared that her mother had died during childbirth. Another in her seventies had lost her mother when she was in her nineties.

They were able to bond over missing mothers. “There is grief, but it is nothing like a funeral,” Brock said.

Mia Watkins with her mother, Danni Joyce Watkins, who died in 2015 at age 59.