Dear Annie: Weâre worried elderly neighbors are being taken advantage of by their son

Dear Annie: We have elderly neighbors who have allowed their 62-year-old son and his wife of five years to move in with them while they look for a house.

The son lost his job in California, which he used as an excuse to move here to Washington. That was three months ago. They don’t seem to be looking for a house. When the elderly homeowners asked why they were not looking, the reply was that they can’t afford it.

We have been helping the elderly neighbors for years — mowing their lawn and keeping up their yard. Since the son moved in, he has not done a thing to help around the place.

Our feeling is they are just waiting for the elderly couple to pass away and they will take over the house, which is paid for. How can we help the elderly couple? — Concerned Neighbors

Dear Concerned Neighbors: My first question is: Did your elderly neighbors ask for your help in confronting their adult son? It’s not clear from your letter, but there is a distinct possibility that they are fine with the arrangement and grateful to have their son close by.

If they did ask for your help, the best you can do is to advise them to communicate their needs. It is admirable that you want to help, but this is a conversation that is best had between your neighbors and their son.

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“How Can I Forgive My Cheating Partner?” is out now! Annie Lane’s second anthology — featuring favorite columns on marriage, infidelity, communication and reconciliation — is available as a paperback and e-book. Visit Creators Publishing for more information. Send your questions for Annie Lane to [email protected].