Dear Annie: My boyfriend is affectionate one day and distant the next, and Iâm getting whiplash!

Dear Annie: I’ve found myself in a dating maze and desperately need some advice. I’ve been dealing with some mixed signals from the person I’m dating; he’s all about making plans and being super affectionate one day, then is distant and elusive the next. I’m getting whiplash. How do I make sense of this behavior without coming off as needy or insecure? I genuinely care about the connection but could use some tips for decoding this emotional puzzle. — Love Limbo

Dear Love Limbo: If you haven’t done so already, it’s probably time for the dreaded “what are we?” conversation. It sounds like you are genuinely invested in this person, and ready for a more serious commitment. If he isn’t on the same page, then you’re wasting your time. The only way to find out the answer is to ask.

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“How Can I Forgive My Cheating Partner?” is out now! Annie Lane’s second anthology — featuring favorite columns on marriage, infidelity, communication and reconciliation — is available as a paperback and e-book. Visit Creators Publishing for more information. Send your questions for Annie Lane to [email protected].