Dear Annie: My bossy relative pushes religion on me, and itâs worse when sheâs drinking

Dear Annie: We have a relative coming from out of town to visit for a week. I’d love to say I’m excited to see her, but I’m not. Last time she stayed, I was ready to push her out the door! She’s bossy and tries to tell me what to do and how to do it. I don’t appreciate people questioning me, especially in my own home. She’s fanatically religious. I’m the opposite. She pushes religion and her God on me to the point that I get so angry. And she gets worse when she’s drinking. She’s not even here and I’m ready for her to be gone. How do I handle this? — Unwelcome

Dear Unwelcome: If you were ready to push her out the door after her last visit, then I don’t recommend opening your home to her again. Sounds like it’s too late to rescind the invite, but in the future, when she comes to town, tell her you’d love to see her but your week is a bit too hectic to host this time. Offer to meet up for a meal or an activity instead.

There are still some ways to make this upcoming visit more manageable. For starters, don’t serve any alcohol. When the topic of religion comes up, tell her that you appreciate her concern but that you are an adult who has made her own decisions about religion, and those decisions are not changing. Also tell her that the constant religious pressure is driving a wedge in your relationship with her and, frankly, driving you away from religion altogether. That way, assuming her goal is for you to see the light, it’s in her best interest to pipe down.

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“How Can I Forgive My Cheating Partner?” is out now! Annie Lane’s second anthology — featuring favorite columns on marriage, infidelity, communication and reconciliation — is available as a paperback and e-book. Visit Creators Publishing for more information. Send your questions for Annie Lane to [email protected].