Dear Annie: I’ve fallen for my wife’s sister. Should I tell my wife?

Dear Annie: I’m retired, which is fine, but not having to go to a job only leaves me with more time to live with my problem. It’s one that I’ve had for a very long time. My wife’s sister came to live with us, and I got along with her very well, and when I wasn’t working, we spent a lot of time together. We had a lot in common, which led to me actually falling for her.

I doubt that she feels the same way, and I never told her or anyone about it, but that doesn’t make it any less of a problem. I know it has affected my marriage, but I just can’t find a way to fall out of love with either one.

She hasn’t lived with us for a long time now, but she’s still with us even though she’s not living with us. I try to go on as though nothing is wrong, but I know it would be better if I could erase it from my mind, but I guess it’s going to be here until I’m gone.

Should I tell my wife? — Life Problems

Dear Life Problems: You didn’t specify how your marriage was affected by your crush on your wife’s sister. The truth is you are allowed to be friends with your sister-in-law and get along with her, but while you are married, you are not allowed to act on it. Ask yourself why you felt so attracted to your sister-in-law instead of your wife. Sometimes when there are problems, it is easier to fantasize about what life with another would be like, when in reality that is just a fantasy and real life is passing you by. Seek the help of a professional marriage counselor to help you and your wife.

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“How Can I Forgive My Cheating Partner?” is out now! Annie Lane’s second anthology — featuring favorite columns on marriage, infidelity, communication and reconciliation — is available as a paperback and e-book. Visit Creators Publishing for more information. Send your questions for Annie Lane to [email protected].