Dear Annie: I’m a single man in my late 30s, and after a few years of being out of the dating game, I’ve started putting myself out there again. But I’m finding it harder than ever to tell when a woman is genuinely interested — and when she’s just being polite or playing along with no intention of taking things further.

Here’s an example: I recently met someone at a friend’s party. We hit it off right away — laughing, talking for hours and even exchanging numbers. I texted her the next day, and she responded warmly. But after a few messages, she stopped replying. A week later, she liked a photo of mine on social media, which left me confused. Is she interested or not?

This kind of mixed signal seems to happen a lot. Some women seem friendly and engaged, but when I try to make plans, they ghost or dodge the idea altogether. I’m not trying to rush anything; I just want to know when to take a hint and when it’s worth pursuing.

How can a guy tell the difference between a woman who’s genuinely attracted and open to dating, versus one who’s just being nice — or keeping him around for attention? I don’t want to waste anyone’s time, including my own. — Hoping for Something Real

Dear Hoping for Something Real: Many men and women struggle to read the signals in today’s dating world. But here’s the truth, and it has been the truth for as long as dating began: When someone is genuinely interested, you won’t have to do mental gymnastics to figure it out.

If a woman likes you and wants to see you, she’ll make it clear. She’ll respond to your messages, accept your invitations and show up — consistently. If she’s always vague, avoids making plans or disappears for days, she’s not serious. Friendly texting and the occasional social media “like” mean nothing without real effort behind them.

Don’t waste your energy decoding mixed messages. If you have to guess how someone feels, odds are they’re not as interested as you’d like them to be.

Move on politely and confidently. The right person won’t leave you hanging.

Read more Dear Annie and other advice columns.

“How Can I Forgive My Cheating Partner?” is out now! Annie Lane’s second anthology — featuring favorite columns on marriage, infidelity, communication and reconciliation — is available as a paperback and e-book. Visit Creators Publishing for more information. Send your questions for Annie Lane to [email protected].