Dear Annie: I only hear from my grandchildren when there is a fundraiser and they want a donation
Dear Annie: I’m conflicted, just as I am sure many grandparents are in my situation. I have one child, a son, who is married with four children, my grandchildren. In spite of poor health, I have been a hands-on grandmother, taking them on trips, paying one’s way to Hawaii as a graduation gift, etc.
The only time I hear from these kids is if there is a fundraiser and they want a donation. I give birthday money and Christmas gifts. I never get a response or a thank you. My question is, should I continue giving under these circumstances or stop altogether any gift giving?
This is very difficult for me, as I love these kids very much. — Feeling Unappreciated
Dear Unappreciated: No one likes to feel used or like their presents were not appreciated. Speak with your son about asking his kids to say thank you once in a while to their grandmother. It will serve them well in life to learn the value of showing appreciation when someone does something kind for you.
You definitely should not cut them off. Do you only give to get a thank you, or does it feel good to give? Have you enjoyed the trips with your grandkids? Don’t let the bad manners of your grandkids make you and them miss out on quality family vacations. That is time you can’t get back. You can look at their mistakes as teaching moments.
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