DEAR ABBY: I have been with my husband for 22 years and married for 18. I’ve had multiple illnesses and continue dealing with them. We haven’t been intimate in four years.

We live together but no longer sleep together. My husband doesn’t like to have fun or travel with me. He’s boring and likes to argue, which makes me angry. I want to get away from him and find someone who can make me happy. I came out of abusive relationships before I met him. What should I do? — DISILLUSIONED IN CONNECTICUT

DEAR DISILLUSIONED: It might benefit you to talk with a licensed mental health professional. Try to find out why you tolerated abusive relationships before you met your husband and how the one you have with him has gone sour. Has your husband always been boring and argumentative, or did it begin when you stopped sleeping together?

Before embarking on a new relationship expecting that you will find someone who magically makes you happy, spend some time ON YOUR OWN. It’s important that you understand what has gone wrong in your previous relationships with men so that you don’t repeat mistakes you may have made in the past.

Read more Dear Abby and other advice columns.

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.