DEAR ABBY: Should I be upset that my grandchildren have a step-grandfather who has no children of his own and is always giving money and other gifts to my grandchildren? I bought my 18-year-old grandson a used car with the understanding that he would repay me in installments when he started working. He did just that, and then he had a fender bender, so I helped him get it partially repaired. I made the same deal with him as before. I paid for the repairs; he again repaid me in installments.

Well, one of the doors has a large dent and won’t open. Now he has sweet-talked his step-grandfather into shopping for another car! My grandson doesn’t want to fix the door because it’s easier to get his step-grandfather to buy him another car. Should I be upset about this? What should I tell his step-grandfather? — FRUSTRATED GRANDFATHER

DEAR GRANDFATHER: I can see why you would be concerned. You have been trying to not only help your grandson but also to teach him responsibility. His well-meaning step-grandfather is interfering with that. By all means, have a discussion with him because Step-Grandpa is being manipulated. If he really wants to help your grandson, he should consider treating him to driving lessons.

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Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.