DEAR ABBY: My two married sons don’t get along at all. They both have children. One is moving from overseas to the city where I live. The son who is local is furious. He says he won’t see me anymore because he knows his brother will be staying with me for a short while. Therapy hasn’t seemed to work. This tears me apart, especially because my grandchildren are involved. Any ideas? — TORN UP IN FLORIDA

DEAR TORN UP: As a matter of fact, I do have one: Do NOT permit your “local” son to emotionally blackmail you. Tell him that you, not he, will decide who you have under your roof, and if he follows through on his threat, the people who suffer will be HIS CHILDREN, not you, and not his brother. Then put your foot down and stick to it.

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Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.