DEAR ABBY: I had an unfortunate incident at my son’s wedding 11 years ago, for which I feel people are still judging me. I was sick in the months before my son’s wedding and had just returned to work. The week of the wedding, my husband was in the hospital. He was discharged the morning of the wedding, with IV antibiotics to be given at home by me for several weeks. The wedding was big and beautiful. Classy.

During the reception, my husband’s family read a poem they had written about my husband’s medical problem to those in attendance. I was upset and decided to calm down by taking a walk around the neighborhood. While I was walking, the dance with my son was called, but I wasn’t there. Instead of rescheduling for when I returned, my mother-in-law danced with my son. This was deeply upsetting to find out afterward. I don’t think my husband should have let his mother do that. What are your thoughts? — CAN’T LET GO IN THE MIDWEST

DEAR CAN’T LET GO: I think what’s past is past, what’s done is done, and you should stop dwelling on something you cannot change. If there is fault to be found, you all own a share of it. Now let it go.

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Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.