DEAR ABBY: My son is getting married in Mexico in six months. I would like to take a special friend with me as my plus-one. My wife has dementia. It is quite severe, and she has been in a care facility for two years. She no longer recognizes anyone, including me. Would it be wrong to take my lady friend to Mexico? We haven’t been intimate yet, but romance at the beach in Mexico is very possible. What do I do? — UNCERTAIN IN IOWA

DEAR UNCERTAIN: Your son’s wedding is not the time to “surprise” anyone with this lady’s presence. Depending upon how large your family is and how close you all are, some people may already be aware that you’re involved with someone and why. But ask your son and his fiancée if bringing her would be disruptive, and gracefully base your decision on their response. A wedding is supposed to be about the bride and groom on their special day with no distractions.

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Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.