DEAR ABBY: Isn’t it considered bad manners to comment about the length of time someone spends in the restroom? Several times when I’ve been out with people at a restaurant or bar, someone has commented “That was quick!” when I returned to the table. I want to tell them the comment is inappropriate. Any suggestions for an appropriate response that isn’t too snarky would be appreciated. — PRIVATE LADY IN GEORGIA

DEAR PRIVATE LADY: Try this: Smile at the person and say, “I didn’t know you were clocking my action!” (It’s better than saying, “That’s because I didn’t take the time to wash my hands. Would you like me to pass you the bread?”)

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Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.