DEAR ABBY: I’m 22 and have been dating a 55-year-old man I’ll call “Gerald” for a year now. Because of the difference in our ages, I have been trying to find things for us to do together so our relationship can be more than just sex. I really love Gerald and want it to work, but how do I make it work when he won’t meet me halfway?

We really don’t have any reasons to fight except for his jealous ex-wife of 11 years. How do I try to keep this relationship? Everything I suggest Gerald turns down. Is it because deep down he doesn’t want to be in this relationship? Or that he doesn’t think it will go far? — CHALLENGED IN PENNSYLVANIA

DEAR CHALLENGED: I am not a mind reader, but it appears your “silver fox” is happy with the relationship just as it is. That’s the reason he shoots down your suggestions for ways to expand it beyond the bedroom. You can’t make a relationship work all by yourself. Gerald has to be willing to participate. If his reaction to everything you suggest is opposition, it may be time to move on and find someone with whom you have more in common.

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Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.