DEAR ABBY: One night about six months ago, my mom walked out on my dad. A week later, she admitted she had been having an affair for a whole year. My parents’ divorce was final three months after she left. Mom has now announced to me and my siblings that she’s engaged and plans to marry her fiance just six months after the divorce. We think it’s a terrible idea. We really dislike her fiance and think he’s a bad guy based on our interactions with him. Mom claims to be happy, but we don’t believe her. Should we just let her live her life? How do we accept this new reality? — THROWN IN WASHINGTON

DEAR THROWN: If you and your siblings plan to maintain a relationship with your mother, handle this like the hot potato it is. Recognize that things were not as rosy as you assumed in your parents’ marriage, take things one step at a time, and make an extra effort to look out for your father. Then cross your fingers and hope that as painful as this disruption is, everything works out for the best.

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Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.