Miranda Lambert paused a recent show in Las Vegas to scold fans taking selfies during her performance.

“I’m gonna stop right here for a second, I’m sorry,” Lambert,” said on stage. “These girls are worried about their selfie and not listening to the song. It’s pissing me off a little bit.

“Sorry, I don’t like it. At all. We’re here to hear some country music tonight. I’m singing some country damn music.”

This prompted a debate about concert etiquette. Is it fair or foul to take selfies while an artist is performing on stage? Did the country superstar overreact?

We enlisted the expertise of AL.com music mavens Mary Colurso and Matt Wake to discuss concert behavior of all types, from the artists on stage and the fans in the venue. It’s a fascinating conversation about self-awareness, entitlement and really just how to act right in a live show setting.

Listen to the conversation, or read below.

Ben Flanagan: I don’t know if you guys saw, but Whoopi Goldberg apparently walked off the set of “The View” while talking about Miranda Lambert and this whole selfie story. So I want us to keep our cool here and nobody click the leave button or anything. Mary and Matt, you are AL.com’s music experts, covering concerts for many years. You’ve seen it all, and I know you both have opinions on this. What was your initial reaction when you heard Miranda Lambert paused mid-song and snapped at fans for taking selfies at a show?

Mary Colurso: My initial reaction was: Hmm, let me look at the circumstances. We’ve all been privy to all sorts of fan behavior, so I wanted to find out how did it happen and what are the particulars. I think, for me, it is always a matter of degree. The fact that this was six women in the front of the venue, turning their backs on the star and using flash to take selfie photos during the concert while she was singing. For me, that makes it uncool. I think Miranda Lambert has every right to say something about it if it annoyed her. They were clearly right there down front in her eyeline. If she just said something about it and moved on, which is apparently what happened, I think she had every right to do that. Why not? Just because fans pay for tickets doesn’t mean they have the right to do anything they want. We’ve all been behind the person who stands up and dances throughout the whole show and they’re the only person doing that, or the fan who sings in your ear through the entire show and you can’t hear the star. In this case, I think it was uncool. I don’t think selfies in general are uncool, but in this case, I think this was over the line.

Matt Wake: I think there’s a difference. Using an artist as a selfie background is not cool and kind of lame and silly. And also, the context of it was a ballad. If it was an up-tempo country partying song, I doubt she notices as much, and I doubt the rest of the people notice it much. The thing I think this is also reflective of is it used to be in the ‘80s or ‘90s — and get out your old man yelling at the sky meme — but the people who were close were the fans who sat outside the gates of the venue before the show started and waited the longest and rushed to the front, because they loved that band. Now, although a few artists like jam bands do general admission floor, a lot of the times the close-up seats go to those with the most dough — 500 bucks, 250 bucks, 1,000 bucks per ticket. I think this kind of behavior doesn’t happen as much if you have a GA floor. So those were my initial thoughts on it.

Mary: The other thing is this was a social media influencer who is taking these photos. It’s not just some excited fan who’s like “Woohoo! Miranda Lambert!” It’s like, “Here’s me and my friends at Miranda Lambert so I can post this online and you can think I’m fabulous and maybe support whatever the heck products…” I mean, again, I don’t know too much about this social media influencer, but clearly it was about her, not about the concert and the star.

Matt: There’s a lot of good things that come out of social media and a lot of good things that every generation does. But every once in a while, something happens that’s like the caricature of why people hate on social media influencers or Instagram obsessives. This was like a caricature of what people who dislike Instagram selfie stuff. This crystallized it, I think.

Mary: I’ve been to shows where fans do that, they use the star as a backdrop for their selfie photo. I remember a Cyndi Lauper show at the Alys Stephens Center, where a woman near me just did the same thing. But it was one woman in the middle of kind of a rowdy song. It took maybe five seconds, and Cyndi Lauper was fairly far away. I’m sure she didn’t even notice it. I rolled my eyes and moved on. This is a little bit more extreme. I think it’s interesting that the social media influencer is complaining about it publicly, saying she felt like Miranda Lambert was taking her to school and trying to humiliate her and all this stuff. The star gets to have an opinion, too, and she thought it was uncool and said so. It’s not like she said it 15 times or walked off stage. Stuff happens.

Ben: I’ll put it plainly. Selfies during concerts: Fair game or bad form?

Matt: I think it has to be in context. There would be degrees for me. Like this one, where they basically turn it into a photo session that lasts for more than just a split moment or so, an extended period of time. I think that’s that’s uncool. I think it’s lame. I think it’s bad form. Also, I think it’s how close you are. I think if you’re in the cheap seats and you wanna hand the phone to somebody who’s behind you and you and your best friend take a quick photo of you and your buddy in front of the Red Hot Chili Peppers performing three zip codes away at a ginormous stadium, I think that’s fine. Case by case, but obviously up front, a slow kind of quiet song — yeah, I think it’s bad form. How disruptive is it? If it’s further back, if it’s more raucous song, I think it’s more fair game. And also, how quickly you do it. It would have to be case by case for me.

Mary: I’m with Matt. I personally have no desire to take a selfie anywhere. I’m pretty old school about that, and when I’m at a concert, I’m all about what’s happening on stage. It’s not about me. It’s about the show, and it’s about the artist. However, I understand that other people get all excited and want to take selfies. I think that’s all fine within reason, and I think that you can’t stop people from doing it. It would be silly to even try. So selfies in general? Sure, take your selfie. Make it quick, but if you’re right front of the artist with six friends, like Matt says, during a slow song and you’re using your flash? No.

Ben: What’s your general on take on cell phones at shows? Whatever pic you’re taking is going to be grainy and maybe one you’ll never look at again in your life, but people can’t help it in the moment. Do either of you ever bust them out?

Mary: My cell phone is out when I am taking notes, taking a photo, checking the set list, something like that. But never selfie and never to take a video of somebody performing. I mean, I’m just a terrible photographer and my cell phone camera is not that great, so that is not a good souvenir to me. It also takes you out of the moment. You miss half the song while you’re fiddling with your cell phone. However, I think cell phones are here to stay. People use them like crazy. As long as you’re not waving your cell phone in my particular face throughout the entire show and blocking my view, I’m cool with it. I think trying to pouch all cell phones at all shows would be silly and inefficient and people would scream. I went to a show at Sloss Furnaces a few years back, She and Him. Zooey Deschanel did not want anybody with their cell phones out. And she kept saying it, three or four times during the show. And forgive me, Zooey, but my response to that was say it once and shut up. She made too big a deal out of it. So let’s be reasonable here. Reasonable with cell phones, reasonable with what we’re doing, period, at a concert.

Matt: Self awareness comes to mind for me. Like a quick photo. Say you’ve got a friend who’s not there or a relative, and this song makes you think of them. Take a short clip of it and put your cell phone back up, and then text it to them or whatever. Stuff like that makes people feel good sometimes and connects them. But the amateur videographer or where it’s just out all the time, that’s not self aware. It’s like if you’re at a party or on a road trip in a car, half the people are looking at their phones the whole time and the driver sitting there like it has to drive four hours, or at a family dinner or whatnot. It’s self awareness. I’ve been to a couple of the pouch shows and I can tell you this. Now, I don’t have kids, so I understand people who have kids might not be crazy about the pouch thing, but I’ll tell you what. I think they were both Jack White shows and I think Chris Rock also, but I never once was like, “Damn man, I wish I had my cell phone” or “If only we had a sea of rectangles between me and the artist, and this would be so much better.” I never thought that once. People make fun the jam band scene and crowd a lot. And every crowd has their caricatures and kind of gets kind of represented by the kind of the goofiness of that. But when I went to this Phish show recently, you hardly saw any cell phones. People were there for the music. They were getting into it. They were there to hear music. They were there to dance. There were there to enjoy all that with their friends who love this music too, and I gained a whole new respect — and I’ve been to plenty of jam band shows, but not in the cell phone era. I think there’s ways people like to use this stuff, but there’s too much icing and not enough cake.

Mary: I also think there’s that nice cell phone moment, when everybody takes the cell phone out in the stadium and waves it in the air. It’s the substitute for the BIC lighter. I mean, that’s nice. So you know, I like cell phones for that. I also have no problem with the people who use cell phones on like a poll, like the tapers tape and some people do that with cell phones, so they’re not bugging somebody else. I’ve seen that a few times. When I interviewed Kix Brooks not too long ago, he’s a great conversationalist, a very cheerful guy. He mentioned that he wishes everybody would put away their cell phones during the show through the whole thing and just enjoy the show. And again, he’s old school in that regard like me. But he also recognizes people like to have their phones out and use them in various ways. He just wishes they wouldn’t do that. So I mean, you know, I see uses for the cell phone.

Ben: Let’s look at this from Miranda Lambert’s point of view. Matt, you’re a musician. You’ve performed live on many occasions. If you see a cell phone out there or someone taking selfies, are you glad someone’s having a blast at your show, or does it distract you and take you out of the moment?

Matt: I haven’t been on that side of the glass, Ben, in probably about 12 years, so I can say when I was still in that playing field, it wasn’t as saturated and as not as many social media platforms, and I was never in a big enough band. I was happy that someone would admit to being at one of my shows. So it would be different for me. A highly successful artist, they can complain about things that someone who’s mid level or trying to get a toehold in the business, even locally, they’re just happy people with there and having a good time. And then I’m glad you mentioned having a good time because video has resurfaced of Miranda Lambert — who I like fine for a modern country artist. It’s not my wheelhouse, but she’s obviously good at what she does — from 2019. Fans were hitting a beach ball around in the crowd, and she stopped and was like, [paraphrasing] “We’re not at the beach. This is a country music concert.” That’s getting a little “Grinch who Stole Concert,” you know what I mean? A little Karen-like to use a modern stereotypical phrase. One thing I love about full band concerts is it’s not like a singer/songwriter thing or stand-up comedy where the whole time I have to be silent and focus entirely on this one person’s brilliance or get shushed or yelled at by the performer. I like it when a performance makes me have a good time. I’m not gonna turn it into a volleyball game out there with the beach ball, but I can tell you when I saw The Grateful Dead with Garcia back in the day, there was a lot of things being bounced around and people were having a great time. Mick Jagger or Rod Stewart, they’ve been playful with the crowd kicking balloons or soccer balls. I think there’s a certain point where it’s like, OK you don’t wanna be a selfie background, but it’s a concert, not a…

Mary: A funeral.

Matt: Exactly! We think you’re good, we’re here, but we don’t have to focus on your brilliance the whole time and sit with our hands in our lap.

Mary: It’s hard for me to say because I’m not a performer. However, I would assume Miranda Lambert has nights when she’s pissy, like everybody has nights when they’re pissy. Maybe they got her on a pissy night when she was being grinchy. The beach ball example, that’s grinchy. Maybe another venue, another night, another mood, she wouldn’t have said anything. She gets to do that. She’s a big star, and she has a big audience. I wasn’t there. If you’ll forgive me, let me just expand it this way. I’ve been to Tim McGraw shows where the fans were grabbing his crotch at the side of the stage. That’s uncool. No need to grab the star’s crotch when he’s at the side of the stage near you. You can be a fan without doing that. He gets mad sometimes. Other times he just brushes them off and keeps going. That’s kind of an extreme example. Or I think we can all agree it’s completely uncool to throw a beer can at the star and try to hit them on stage, right? They have a right to be mad at that anytime, anywhere. This is more like this day, this mood, this thing. She gets those days, I think she. And we can roll our eyes or not, depending on how we feel at day.

Matt: That’s a great point, Mary. And it’s something I’ve been thinking about a lot. Stars, celebrities, they’re also human beings, and they have bad days. Their cat might have died. Their accountant might have messed up and cost them some money. They might have an ailment and they went ahead and played the show anyway. They’re not feeling great. I saw Guns N’ Roses on the “Use Your Illusion” tour when Axl Rose was getting pelted with mud at the Birmingham race course. At the time, when I was waiting tables and a college student, I was like, “Oh man, he’s a rock star. He’s being a prima donna.” If you threw mud at me while I was trying to type up a concert review, I would not be happy about that. It’s very clickable now for people to write these things about pop singers getting objects thrown at them. Rock bands have gotten stuff thrown at them for 50 years. I’m talking about bottles full of urine for hard rock and metal crowds. I’m talking about bands like Led Zeppelin who had death threats. Throwing firecrackers at the stage, which is kind of disconcerting. To flip that, there’s a country singer out there who is talented, who hasn’t had a break, who hasn’t had the ball bounce their way, who would love to be playing in arena and have people be taking selfies in front of her or him.

Mary: There’s a local artist here in Birmingham, Jessica Muse, former “American Idol” contestant. She tours with Black Jacket Symphony. She did like a Stevie Nicks show with them. She posted recently, something like, “By the way, y’all can take selfies at my shows anytime you want.” She feels that way now, and I respect that. And she maybe would feel that way if she was at some gigantic arena or some, you know, big bucks theater. I hate to be wishy washy but it’s all relative. It really is.

Ben: OK, final verdict here. Miranda Lambert’s selfie gripe: Fair or foul?

Mary: Fair. Period. Fair.

Matt: Fair, 100 percent. Lame, didn’t care about the people around you who may have been between you and the artist. No self awareness of it was a slow song that might have met a lot to Miranda Lambert. The time involved, the people involved. Fair.

Mary: And she kept singing. It’s not like she walked off stage or had a temper tantrum. The writer for the Las Vegas Review Journal was there, and he said six women taking multiple selfies with flash, VIP section, backs to the stage. I get her frustration. This is ridiculous. I’m with him.

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