Dear Eric: How should I tell my husband he has breasts? He is not a vain man, and I suspect does not study himself in a mirror. He is on many new meds which can result in developing this condition.

For the most part he is fully dressed, but it’s summertime and he may, at some point, want to remove his shirt to swim with friends. I’m sure he would be embarrassed to do so if he knew how he looks. I don’t want to make him self-conscious, and he may get angry with me for pointing this out to him and making him self-conscious. I also fear he will discontinue the meds he needs as a reaction to this discovery.

– Reserved Observation

Dear Observation: Are the breasts on his back? The only way I can see this being useful information is if he has new growths in a place he can’t see and isn’t aware of. Otherwise, please leave him be.

He may not be vain, or even particularly observant, but he is still a person in a body and he, presumably, showers and dresses himself. So, he is aware of what he looks like. And, with that awareness, if he chooses to take off his shirt at a pool day with people he’s comfortable around, let him. My goodness, life can be so short on pleasures. If he’s not embarrassed, don’t give him a reason to be. Everyone’s body is their own business.

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Send questions to R. Eric Thomas at [email protected] or P.O. Box 22474, Philadelphia, PA 19110. Follow him on Instagram and sign up for his weekly newsletter at rericthomas.com.