Dear Eric: My neighbors and clerks in our local grocery store know I hang out with “Patty.” Sometimes Patty and I shop together. She’s very friendly and gives each cashier and bagger a hug. As a former cashier myself, I’ve told her not to do that. Also, she’s worn the same outfit for more than a month and smells. I’ve never seen her do laundry in our building’s laundry room.

Two employees told me that the manager (who is very nice to me) is on the verge of kicking her out.

She doesn’t have a car, so it’d be rough on her. Should I tell her it’s serious that she may not be allowed in there if she doesn’t tone it down?

– Hugger’s Friend

Dear Friend: Yes. It’s the helpful thing to do and it might lead to a conversation about what else is going on with Patty. The hugging may be a personality quirk, but not doing laundry for a month suggests that there is a problem in her life – economic, emotional, mental or logistical – that’s keeping her from maintaining healthy habits. Talk to her about the store and then ask her, without judgment, if she needs help. Point out what you’ve noticed and, if need be, help her see how these things might be keeping her from the life she wants. If you find yourself out of your depth, offer to go with her to her doctor to talk about what’s going on or bring a mutual friend. Your intervention could help Patty avoid something much worse.

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Send questions to R. Eric Thomas at [email protected] or P.O. Box 22474, Philadelphia, PA 19110. Follow him on Instagram and sign up for his weekly newsletter at rericthomas.com.