Dear Amy: My fiancé and I are both in our mid-20′s. We got married last summer in a small church in our hometown.

The day before our wedding, the minister performing the ceremony scheduled a “walk-through” for 4 p.m. The purpose of this was for us to essentially walk through the ceremony, with us, the attendants, and our folks.

Our minister was extremely clear that this was only for this small group of people, that it would last for 45 minutes to an hour, and that no “plus ones” or other guests should be in the church.

After that, we could move on to the rehearsal cocktails and dinner.

My sister was a bridesmaid. Her long-time boyfriend was of course an invited guest and was invited to the rehearsal dinner and wedding.

We passed along our minister’s instruction and said that her boyfriend should stay behind and meet us afterward for drinks and dinner.

She took this as an insult and while we all got through the wedding, she says she is still mad at me about this.

Should we have allowed him to attend the rehearsal and sit in the back?

– Newlywed

Dear Newlywed: No. The minister’s instruction was simple and valid. You were right to respect it.

You can email Amy Dickinson at [email protected] or send a letter to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068.