Dear Amy: I have a group of friends who recently attended a hobby retreat. Before the retreat we were informed that one of our members (a person we know) has a nut allergy. We were told her allergy was environmental and that she could have a reaction just being around nuts.

Well, when I walked into the venue all four of my friends were eating nuts. When I mentioned the nut allergy, they all laughed. They knew about it but did not especially like the allergic woman and even questioned the validity of her allergy.

I am so angry at them because I feel that they disregarded the health of the allergic woman. How do I get over this? Right now, I am furious.

– Not a Nut

Dear Not a Nut: These people have revealed their disrespectful natures to you. You should be honest with each of them now about how disappointed you are in their behavior, which might have led to a dangerous medical emergency for the allergic person. I assume you are rethinking your friendship with this group; you certainly should not trust them with any sensitive information, because they seem likely to use it against you.

You can email Amy Dickinson at [email protected] or send a letter to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068.