Dear Eric: Before he passed years ago, my father transferred his beach house to his six adult kids. We did not ask to become owners of a shared house, and I always thought it was a horrible idea.

Most of us kids tend to travel to different places, while one has always loved to vacation at the beach house. My father would hand expenses to those of us with higher incomes, not to the sibling who loved the house, as he couldn’t afford the upkeep.

The five siblings who didn’t want the house or expense said it was time to sell. Years went by. The brother who wants the house is unable to buy it or maintain it on his own. He promised it would impact our relationship if we forced the sale, which we ultimately did, and he kept his word (now estranged). Of course, the proceeds from the house were shared equally, after the legal fees.

Close family friends have heard my brother’s side, and mentioned to me I could afford the house and shouldn’t have sold it. I’m hurt by the judgment and don’t know what to say. Do I let it go? Suggest they buy the house for my brother?

– No Rest on Vacation

Dear Vacation: Why should you bear the burden of upkeep on a house you don’t even want? Your family friends are doing backseat accounting, an even more egregious sin than backseat driving. Were you supposed to take on the expense by yourself and buy your other siblings out of the house? The math ain’t mathing.

Tell your family friends that it wasn’t possible for you financially, no matter what they think. And ask them how much they’re interested in pitching in.

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Send questions to R. Eric Thomas at [email protected] or P.O. Box 22474, Philadelphia, PA 19110. Follow him on Instagram and sign up for his weekly newsletter at rericthomas.com.