DEAR MISS MANNERS: I received a text and pictures from a work friend (who I keep in touch with during my retirement) about her daughter, who had just given birth to a beautiful baby girl.

I was surprised, because my friend had not mentioned anything, and was just preparing my “congratulations” and some happy thoughts on her being a first-time grandmother, when she further mentioned that this was a surrogacy, and that her daughter was giving birth for another couple.

While I think this is a beautiful and selfless act on the part of her daughter, I was flummoxed as to my response to this new information. Congratulations seemed somehow odd, but my “Wow, I had no idea. How is she doing?” and “Tell her hello for me” may also have missed the mark. What would Miss Manners do?

GENTLE READER: Quote you. “What a beautiful and selfless act. I hope your daughter is doing well.”

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