Dear Amy: I have a recurring issue when going out with my girlfriend’s brother.

Every time we plan to go out with him and his wife, the outings revolve around their children.

As a happily childfree man in his 40s, I have no desire to spend my Saturday watching kids play in a crowded play space.

I have suggested activities that are child-friendly, like the bike park or skiing. These are activities I would also enjoy, yet they still aren’t suitable for his youngest child, so my ideas get shut down.

My girlfriend wants me to have a relationship with her family (and I do, too), but these kid-centric hangs are like torture for me.

How can I explain that I don’t want to hang out with her young nieces without upsetting the balance?

– Happily Childfree

Dear Childfree: These young parents are very caught up with their children. Since this is basically the definition of being a parent, you should accept that this is their life, their choice, and quite possibly their greatest joy.

Even people who love children and love being with children can find spending Saturday mornings at the ball pit or Gymboree with kids who are not related to them pretty torturous.

Your girlfriend is an aunt to these children. She is heavily vested in this relationship.

But you are not, and you don’t need to be.

You have tried to suggest other activities that would be more amusing for you – but for these family members, Saturday mornings are not about you.

If you want to get to know these parents better, you might ask if they can find a sitter some evening so that you adults can socialize together.

I wonder if your girlfriend is testing the waters to gauge how happy you really are at being childfree. I suggest that you be completely transparent about this.

You can email Amy Dickinson at [email protected] or send a letter to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068.