DEAR ABBY: We live in a retirement community. Many of our friends have hearing loss that ranges from slight to profound. While most of them have the money to travel the globe, they don’t invest in hearing aids, which confounds us.

In restaurants, they keep bending their ears toward us and saying “Eh?” to just about every word. We are careful to enunciate clearly for their benefit, but it doesn’t help much. Our natural inclination is to speak louder, which has embarrassed us several times as other diners grew quiet and turned to look at us.

On the most recent occasion, I brought a little notebook and pen in my purse, and when I wrote out a couple of responses, the wife looked offended. It didn’t feel comfortable, but I thought it would be better than yelling or avoiding conversation altogether.

We find ourselves declining invitations with them more often in favor of electronic communication. These are delightful people otherwise. We’re just not sure how to handle this. Do you have any suggestions? — WORKING EARS IN FLORIDA

DEAR WORKING EARS: Yes, I do. Tell these people privately that they may need to get their hearing checked because you are having to shout when you go out in public. Hearing loss happens to many seniors, and those who have the problem can find themselves increasingly isolated. This is why it’s so important to consult an audiologist when you start noticing a need to raise the volume on the television, or you often have to ask people to repeat what they have said to you.

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Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.