Dear Annie: I need advice on how to approach my son about the disorder in his house. He was raised in a very neat home. When he lived alone for several years, his house was immaculate. He’s now been married for four years. They have a 2-year-old and one on the way.

Their house is in total disarray — laundry basket full of dirty clothes, counters and every surface full of junk. He does all the cooking and works full time. I don’t want to insult them, but I can afford to get them organized. I don’t want to overstep as the mother-in-law, though. Any advice? — Neat Freak

Dear Neat Freak: It sounds like your son and his wife have their hands full with a 2-year-old and another on the way. I’m sure your son would appreciate a little extra help around the house, but it is possible his wife might not. She might have grown up in a messy household and that’s what makes her comfortable.

Have a conversation with them without criticizing them. Acknowledge how busy they are and that you want to offer your services around the house in any way that might be helpful. Let’s hope that cleaning and organizing top their list, but even if they employ your services with other chores, it will free up more time for them.

Remember “The Odd Couple,” where Felix was a neat freak and Oscar was a slob? If that’s what you are dealing with, you might need to back off if you want to avoid being a meddling mother-in-law.

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