DEAR ABBY: I have been dating my boyfriend, “George,” for 17 years following our divorces. I have three grown children. He has four — two of whom are still at home. We have never lived together.

My daughter and George’s son (still at home) had a crush on each other when they were teenagers. Fast-forward 10 years — they have reunited and expressed their love for one another. Although George cares deeply for all my children, I’m afraid he feels my daughter may not be the best choice for his son. She is unemployed and has health issues, and his family’s opinions (they are VERY outspoken and value a strong work ethic) weigh heavily on his son.

George “parents” his adult children who are still living with him. (George stayed home until he got married at 30.) His parenting style includes hollering at his kids when they’re not tending to their chores or his directives or they’re staying out all night. This could possibly come between us. I should add, he’s always been good to me in every way. What do you think of all this? — LESS CERTAIN IN THE EAST

DEAR LESS CERTAIN: What I think should have no bearing on any of this. The “children” are all adults. You can’t orchestrate their lives for them. You and George need to calm down and let this scenario play out. Que sera, sera.

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Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.