Dear Amy: I am in my mid-30′s. Over the last 10 years, my life has changed significantly.

I’m married now and my husband and I have two children.

I’ve been struggling a bit lately with looking way down the road.

I used to be this very adventurous person. I was more or less up for anything. I’d describe myself as almost daring and unconventional.

Yesterday my husband and I had a lengthy (and I mean lengthy) conversation about granite countertops.

Our kids are three and five years old. Our world revolves around them, other families with children their ages, our jobs, and our house.

I find myself wondering what happened to us and wondering how we can fix it.

– Safe but not Sound

Dear Safe: First of all, even though you are deep into the wooliest part of your family life, you possess enough perspective to remember your earlier self with fondness – and you want to reclaim access to that person and those feelings.

Some people dive into the granite conversation, and they stay there, forever, locked into choices and actions that are ultimately superficial.

My first suggestion is that you might consider the perspective that raising children at this stage is actually loaded with tiny adventures and some big challenges. You and your husband are scaling small mountains every day.

Second, I think that you two should leave your children, and your home environment, for a weekend. Two whole days.

While away, you should rest, relax, and make a determination to look at your larger life-goals. Reach for the sky and write down your list.

You want more adventure: what are some ways you can get that as individuals, as a couple, and as a family?

How can you raise your children to be free, brave, and bold souls?

When you’re young, adventure has a way of finding you.

When you’re older, you have to deliberately seek it. I hope you will.

You can email Amy Dickinson at [email protected] or send a letter to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068.