DEAR ABBY: I am 36, still single and depressed about it. I recently met someone who seemed perfect. He has his own place with laundry facilities, and his job is the kind where he doesn’t have a bunch of other people in his life. So when he asked me over, I went.

I thought because our friends and family were similar, his values would be, too. I expected he would want to get to know me and have a conversation, but he went right for kissing. I’m so disappointed. Then he told me he doesn’t want a relationship! Why did he do that? Why do they want to kiss but then not have a relationship? Does he prefer to sit home each night alone and enjoy someone only on Saturdays? What IS that?

I want someone all the time in my life, like a married couple has. My parents are still together. They had a few problems along the way, but they are still together. Why are the men I meet not marriage material? — ON WRONG PATH IN PENNSYLVANIA

DEAR WRONG PATH: When searching for a relationship, there’s more to take into consideration than how nice the man’s apartment is, whether it has laundry facilities and how many co-workers he may have at his job. The man you met may have thought you were interested in a hookup because you went to his place without first getting to know him in a neutral setting, as most women do these days.

Where are you meeting these prospects? You might have better luck if you find activities you enjoy where you can meet people of both sexes with whom you share similar interests. If you do, your chances of meeting quality people will increase.

Read more Dear Abby and other advice columns.

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.