DEAR ABBY: My mother is still married to the man who molested my siblings and me. How do I forgive her and move past it? We had a close mother-daughter relationship until two years ago, when I asked her why she was still married to the man her children told her repeatedly had molested them. She didn’t answer. She chose him, walked out and we haven’t spoken since. It’s hard for me to deal with. I don’t understand, and I don’t know how to get past it. Not having your mother because she passes away is hard, but the feeling of not having her while she’s alive is a whole different kind of pain. — FULL OF PAIN IN TEXAS

DEAR FULL OF PAIN: In my opinion, not all sins are forgivable. Chief among them is turning a blind eye to children who are being sexually abused. Your mother made her choice years ago, and I can only imagine how hurtful it has been for you. An organization called R.A.I.N.N. (Rape, Abuse and Incest National Network) may be helpful because it can connect you with experienced therapists. (The website is rainn.org.)

The man to whom your mother has given her allegiance is a danger to the community. If he would abuse you and your siblings, he would have no compunction about doing it to other children given the opportunity. You (and your siblings) should notify the police about what happened to you because it could happen over and over again.

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Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.