Dear Annie: Aunt wants more family time, but her invitations are irritating relatives

Dear Annie: My nephew, by marriage, has a large family. I deeply love each one of their children. We live in the same state but a couple hours away (you would think it was a couple of states away). I try to create events for us to see each other — meet here, we can do this or that, attend special shows together.

The problem is I may invite them and the other relatives on that side to 10-15 things throughout the year. They may accept two. They complain that I invite too much. I’m trying to find things they would like. My desire is to build a strong relationship with their children. I’m at a TOTAL loss!! — Discouraged Great Aunt

Dear Discouraged: You sound very caring and thoughtful with nothing but good intentions. That said, your family members have expressed feeling overwhelmed by your invitations. That doesn’t mean you should stop pursuing a relationship with them, but instead meet them where they are. Listen and respect their boundaries.

Relationships are two-way streets, and the only thing we can control is how we show up for the people we love. Hopefully, as these relationships gradually grow, your family will be more receptive to your invitations and put more effort into building bonds with you.

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“How Can I Forgive My Cheating Partner?” is out now! Annie Lane’s second anthology — featuring favorite columns on marriage, infidelity, communication and reconciliation — is available as a paperback and e-book. Visit Creators Publishing for more information. Send your questions for Annie Lane to [email protected].