DEAR ABBY: My husband and I have been retired for almost 10 years. We moved to a coastal resort area we love. However, we have noticed that these retired couples/singles are extremely competitive and mostly a bunch of one-uppers.

Is this common in all retirement communities? Does everyone need to have their last hurrah and wave the “I made it” flag? We have met only a handful of people who don’t always talk about themselves and their achievements, recent purchases, upgrades to their property and genius children/grandchildren.

We have never met so many narcissistic people in our lives. We have always thought that everyone puts their pants on the same way, so we just lay low and steer clear of these people. Any advice would be appreciated. — SURPRISED IN THE CAROLINAS

DEAR SURPRISED: Maintain your relationships with that handful of folks who can carry on a conversation without bragging. Be sociable with everyone and see the braggarts less often.

Most folks who behave this way do it out of insecurity. Enlarge your social circle. Cultivate relationships with people whose values more closely align with yours.

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.