DEAR ABBY: My son dated a girl for 3 1/2 years in high school. Both were sure they had found their life mate. While my husband and I knew it was a long shot, they believed it was true because the girl’s parents had been high school sweethearts.

When school ended, they split up, hoping to remain friends and maybe rekindle when they were older. They are now off to college. Before my son left, rumors started flying that the breakup was his fault, and lies were spread to create a victim and a villain. The gossip came from the girl. My son refused to defend himself. Not one of his friends stood up for him and asked if it was true; they just quietly cut him out.

Three weeks after the breakup, his ex started dating another boy in the friend group. No one, including the parents, have spoken up and pointed out that this is even mildly unethical. To make matters worse, the boy my son’s ex is dating is the brother of my older son’s girlfriend. They are in a serious long-distance relationship, and we were close with this girl’s family. We feel betrayed. Are we overreacting? How can my older son move forward when he has to see his girlfriend’s family all the time? — HARD TO NAVIGATE

DEAR HARD: My advice is to step back and navigate out of this unpleasant situation. Your younger son should thank his lucky stars that his backstabbing ex-girlfriend has moved on. That his friends failed to support him is shameful, but it won’t scar him for life. He will form new relationships and develop new interests in college and put this behind him. Your older son will have to figure out for himself how to handle the delicate situation with his girlfriend’s family. Stay tuned.

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.