Dear Annie: Teen girl worries about peer pressure to drink and take drugs

Dear Annie: I’m a 16-year-old girl and I just finished my junior year of high school. I’ve been excited for summer because it means we get a break from school and because I have a lifeguard job at the community pool. Even though summer break has been a lot of fun, I’m starting to feel pressure from my friends to drink and do drugs. I was invited to more parties during junior year than ever before, and I know of a few boys who just graduated that are planning parties these next few months before they go to college.

At these parties, I’ve noticed how many of my peers are hooking up, drinking beer and smoking pot. I’ve never been interested in any of those things and can usually brush off getting involved (I smoked a cigarette once, but I didn’t like it). But I’m starting to feel like I’m going to be left out if I don’t join in. I know what they’re doing can be dangerous, but I’m not sure how much longer I can keep telling my friends no. I’m worried they’ll either make fun of me or get mad at me.

I feel at a loss. I don’t want to get in trouble, but I also don’t want to lose my friends. — Teen Tired of Not Fitting In

Dear Tired Teen: Anyone who pokes fun at or gets mad at you for sticking to your boundaries isn’t a true friend. It’s perfectly OK to attend social functions and bond with your peers without drinking, smoking or doing anything else that makes you uncomfortable. A simple, “No, thanks, I’m not interested,” politely shuts down offers on the spot and accurately represents how you feel.

You should be proud of honoring and staying true to yourself. A lot of other kids your age would give in to the peer pressure despite how they feel deep down. It’s not always easy, but it’s the right choice to make.

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“How Can I Forgive My Cheating Partner?” is out now! Annie Lane’s second anthology — featuring favorite columns on marriage, infidelity, communication and reconciliation — is available as a paperback and e-book. Visit Creators Publishing for more information. Send your questions for Annie Lane to [email protected].