This is an opinion column.

A cool breeze carries the chirp of a couple of bluebirds nesting. My wife is reading a book on the porch with my youngest son. I’ve got a brisket smoking, and my pants are stained green up to my knees from the weedeater. I smell like smoke, sweat, and grass, but my dogs don’t seem to mind. On such an afternoon, I lose track of my phone, the headlines, and time itself. Gratitude may be the only answer for what’s so deeply broken in us.

Scan the national news over the past week or so. Six people lost their lives in a shooting at The Covenant School in Nashville. Three of them were nine-year-olds. Donald Trump became the first former-president to be criminally indicted. Russia released a new foreign policy which prioritizes “removing the vestiges of U.S. dominance in the world.” Brazil and China ditched the US dollar when paying each other for trade goods.

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We’re expected to have thoughts on all of it regardless of whether we have relevant connection, information, or expertise. We simply must respond to everything, everywhere, whether we want to or not. To make matters worse, leaders, influencers, and pundits across our society scream at us, “Silence is violence!”

What happened to silence being golden?

Tragedy, turmoil, victory, and joy aren’t new to humanity. What has changed is that each of us has the personal digital platform to blast our thoughts to the masses.

“Son, we need to have an attitude of gratitude.” My father’s lessons about appreciation never seemed to surface when I won the game, got the job, or finished the task. The lessons I remember most involved gratefulness for God’s provision when I felt like complaining.

When my father commented on my attitude, he wasn’t trying to minimize my disappointment. He wanted me to get over myself. My friend, Dr. Greg Champion, humorously calls such a malady “imemineosis.” I’ve chuckled about it over the years, but the cult of self has become a deadly epidemic.

Worse yet, we continue to lie to ourselves about the virus.

We spend copious amounts of our days on “social” media. There’s nothing social about it. Everyone is screaming at the same time. We share perspectives that affirm what we already believe and lambast those which offend us. Reasonable interactions that actually change hearts, minds, and perspectives are conspicuously absent because virtual fights are what drives consumption.

When millions of people shout past one another and consume content based entirely on what individuals like, click, and view, we’re dishonest to call it social. On the other hand, honestly labeling echo chambers and self-media for what they are makes us feel bad about ourselves. We can’t have that.

Self is all that exists. Self-exploration. Self-actualization. Self-esteem. There’s nothing wrong with knowing yourself or feeling positive. Too many of us take the concepts too far. Viewing the entire world through the lens of self is a tragically limiting existential perspective.

Consider the rise of preferred personal pronoun use as a matter of social etiquette. Regardless of our thoughts on gender identity, the practice is literally a demand on others to address an individual in a certain way or be accused of bigotry.

Our legal and political systems are increasingly based on our personal feelings instead of law and policy. As a former political staffer, I can’t tell you how many times I’ve watched individuals passionately declare their preferred policy position on Twitter…and never bother to so much as call or email their elected officials.

Gratitude changes everything because it forces us to look beyond ourselves.

Instead of firing off a retreaded take on gun control into the digital void, why not let a teacher in your community know the impact she’s had on your life? Imagine how much each teacher needs to be encouraged right now.

Don’t spend your weekend doom scrolling about a legal proceeding in New York. Leave some cookies in your mailbox for the postal worker who comes by your home more often than most of your family and friends.

As fascinating as the debate over America’s decline might be, let your family know they matter to you by splashing around in a creek catching crawdads. If crayfish are elusive, just go for a walk and talk.

Stop staring at your phone and developing your latest hot take or post. Acknowledge the good in someone else.

My pants are grass-stained because my family spent the morning helping a woman who couldn’t take care of her own yard. We finished in the rain. We were a wet mess, but we laughed and talked the whole time. Truly, we appreciated such an opportunity to serve.

We never know exactly who is showing up for dinner, so we’ll have some extra brisket. I’m grateful for each and every soul who comes through our door and makes our life that much richer.

I’m thankful for a wife who teaches my sons so well. The time and energy she selflessly gives to the young men in our care literally changes their future for the better.

When we step back for a moment and focus our energy on gratitude for others instead of glorifying ourselves, the fever brought on by imemineosis breaks. The digital fantasyland fades. Our anxiety wanes. Our lives and culture can indeed move in a better direction.

Hardship, heartbreak, and headlines aren’t going away. We can change how we respond to them. Sometimes, it’s as simple as appreciating the stains, sweat, and smoke in our lives.

Smith is a recovering political attorney with four boys, two dogs, a bearded dragon, and an extremely patient wife. He engages media, business, and policy through Triptych Media. Please direct outrage or agreement to [email protected] or @DCameronSmith on Twitter.