DEAR ABBY: I am one of three sisters. Our family is pretty close-knit for birthdays and celebrations. However, it has become increasingly problematic in terms of finances. My siblings and I do well, and it’s often assumed that I am doing very well. I know I am blessed to have my job, but with this income comes sizable expenses such as private school, sports clubs and my own children’s birthdays.

My problem is, my middle sister contacted me about hosting a celebration for our younger sister’s approaching milestone birthday. Over the years, it has frequently fallen on our shoulders to finance her birthday celebrations.

Her husband never lifts a finger or offers to pay for them. I’m tired of having to foot a bill of between $500 to $1,000, but I don’t want to be a grinch, either. I have my own family expenses. Am I being unreasonable? — DRAINED SIS IN CALIFORNIA

DEAR DRAINED SIS: You are not being unreasonable; you are stating facts. Have a frank talk with your middle sister about your feelings. Tell her you think it’s time for the two of you to approach this brother-in-law and suggest he pitch in for his wife’s milestone birthday. And in the future, if you plan to host any more birthday parties for her, make them more modest.

Read more Dear Abby and other advice columns.

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.