Dear Eric: It has recently come to light that the father of my goddaughter has been cheating on his wife for almost the entirety of their 30-year marriage. For some reason, the wife has decided to stay with this man. My goddaughter’s destination wedding is coming up soon. I don’t want to be in a room with this man, let alone hug or converse with him. Any tips on how to remain civil over the course of the weekend?

– Disgusted Godmom

Dear Godmom: You can respect your goddaughter’s mother’s choice while drawing a personal line with the father. Either before the wedding or in a private moment on the day of, tell him the truth. “I find it really hard to accept this new information I’ve learned. Your marriage is your business, but I can’t have a relationship with you. For the sake of your daughter, I’m bringing this up now so that we can be civil while still giving each other space.” Weddings are busy events with a lot of different interactions. You won’t be able to avoid taking photos with him, but by being clear upfront, you can avoid small talk made with gritted teeth.

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Send questions to R. Eric Thomas at [email protected] or P.O. Box 22474, Philadelphia, PA 19110. Follow him on Instagram and sign up for his weekly newsletter at rericthomas.com.