Dear Eric: Ten years ago, we lost our 27-year-old son unexpectedly; he died in his sleep. When people asked how I was, like the writer of the letter signed “Still Grieving”, who didn’t know how to respond when people asked, “how are you?” I could not say I was OK. My response became, “I’m managing.” I was managing to get from hour-to-hour/day-to-day. It’s simple and truthful and tended to end the conversation.

– Managing

Dear Managing: That’s a graceful and succinct reply. And, as you said, truthful. I’m sorry for the loss of your son and I’m grateful for the wisdom you shared. We don’t have to hide ourselves from others, even when the truth is less than totally optimistic. Managing is where you were – indeed, where so many of us are – and that’s OK.

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Send questions to R. Eric Thomas at [email protected] or P.O. Box 22474, Philadelphia, PA 19110. Follow him on Instagram and sign up for his weekly newsletter at rericthomas.com.