Dear Eric: My husband and I have been members of a “gourmet group” for more than 35 years. We are now the original members of this group. Other original members have moved away or passed away.

We get together about every two months or so at one of the members’ homes. The hostess compiles a menu and sends the recipes to the other members, and they bring that dish.

To be honest, I really don’t feel we want to continue with this group. I am hosting next and would like to gracefully exit after my turn. Any ideas on how I can do this?

– Time to Go

Dear Time to Go: Make the next dinner a farewell send-off. A gathering like this is the perfect time to say, “thank you and we’re moving on.”

Priya Parker, author of the fantastic book “The Art of Gathering: How We Meet and Why It Matters,” once wrote in her equally great newsletter of the same name, “When we pay attention, we use ceremony to mark (or invent) notable transitions. We invite others to witness and partake and help us make something that can feel nebulous visible. But as our lives and communities change and evolve, we often inherit ceremonies that don’t fit the needs of how we live now.”

The ceremony of the dinners doesn’t serve you now, but it provides you the opportunity to gather those who have meant something to you in the past and allow them to send you off to your next great meal.

Dear Readers: In one of my other lives, I’m a playwright and I’m fortunate enough to have work produced around the country. (Coming soon to a proscenium near you!) I’m delighted to have my first production in Oregon opening this week at Portland Center Stage. “Mrs. Harrison” is a play about two people who reunite at their 10-year college reunion and come into conflict about a shared story from the past. The actors and creative team are fantastic. If you’re near the area, I hope you’ll check it out. I’ll be at the theater doing a panel about personal narrative and my work in this column on Saturday, Jan. 25, 2025.

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Send questions to R. Eric Thomas at [email protected] or P.O. Box 22474, Philadelphia, PA 19110. Follow him on Instagram and sign up for his weekly newsletter at rericthomas.com.