This is an opinion column.

When Tommy Tuberville joined the U. S. Senate, he famously failed in an interview to name the three branches of the federal government. It wasn’t a gotcha journalism ambush, but a softball question about whether Democrats and Republicans could work together.

“You know, our government wasn’t set up for one group to have all three branches of government,” Tuberville said. “It wasn’t set up that way, our three branches, the House, the Senate and executive.”

Setting aside that he forgot about the judicial branch, what Tuberville seems to have been trying to say was that split control was the natural way for things to be, and that it wasn’t healthy for one party to have complete power.

That was then.

Fast forward to the present day. It’s unclear whether he ever learned the three branches of government, but now that doesn’t seem to matter so much to him. Tuberville is comfortable with just one.

“President Trump and J.D. Vance are going to be running the Senate,” Tuberville told Fox Business last week.

The Senate Republican majority will support the president-elect’s cabinet appointees, Tuberville said. And those who don’t will be dealt with severely.

“If you want to get in the way, fine, but we’re gonna try to get you out of the Senate, too, if you try to do that,” Tuberville told the host.

It’s their job, he argued, to support the Trump agenda, not evaluate Trump’s selections. To Tuberville, Trump’s support alone is qualification to lead a federal agency.

“It’s not for us to determine that,” he said.

Only, it kinda is. Were Tuberville ever to read the Constitution he swore to uphold, not only would he learn about the three branches of government, but also the duties of the Senate. Those include scrutinizing the president’s choices for cabinet positions.

He should know this. He fought and opposed all sorts of Biden appointments, including, famously, promotions for top U.S. military officers. He just doesn’t want to scrutinize nominees anymore now that Trump is in charge.

Tuberville likes for people to still call him Coach. But that’s not what he does anymore and that’s not who he is.

Under Trump, Tommy Tuberville is the waterboy.

For the last two years, there have been whispers in Alabama that, were Trump to win the election, Tuberville might get picked to lead the Department of Agriculture, or heaven help us, the Department of Defense. But no one seems to have asked Donald Trump whether that was the plan.

Instead, he’s left Tuberville washing Team Trump’s smelly laundry.

Perhaps, like the kid who makes team manager but dreams of being quarterback, Tuberville is trying to make a good impression in case a starter gets hurt.

With Trump’s roster, who knows? His dream might come to pass.

But to see the team Tuberville failed to make, it’s worth looking at who is up for these jobs.

Pete Hegseth appears to have bested Tuberville for the top defense post by having spent more time on Fox News than the Alabama Senator.

Donald Trump wants to turn over the Department of Education — which he promised to eliminate — to Linda McMahon, a woman whose last job was persuading national television audiences that wrasslin’ is real.

As Secretary of Health and Human Services, Robert Kennedy Jr., promises to bring plot elements of “Dr. Strangelove” into real life and finally determine whether COVID was an inside job.

And Matt Gaetz’s nomination for attorney general shows that, indeed, Trump could do worse than appoint Alabama A.G. Steve Marshall to that post. In the U.S. House, Gaetz has been a nuisance and obstructionist for other Republicans, including Rep. Mike Rogers of Alabama, who had to be restrained from attacking Gaetz on the House floor, and has since been investigated for allegations of statutory rape and human trafficking.

Even Tuberville seems to be hedging on this one, something he normally reserves for day-trading.

There are many more Trump picks to pick over, including climate change deniers at the EPA, Vice President Elon Musk and (checks Twitter) Dr. Oz? The list is long and the day is short.

In the end, it’s the Senate’s job to vet these appointments. It’s Tuberville’s sworn duty.

Instead, he wants to forfeit before kickoff.

Not keen on his cabinet having to answer questions about dead bears or how to safely mix uppers with downers, Team Trump has suggested the Senate allow him to make these picks as recess appointments. He’s literally asking them not to show up for work at all.

He wants them to do nothing.

And Tommy Tuberville is just the man for the job.