DEAR ABBY: I am in an online group with neighbors, but I have not been able to get out and meet some newer members in person. One person signs their posts in a language I don’t recognize, and I was wondering if there is a polite way to ask them how to pronounce their name and what language it is. There doesn’t seem to be a way to broach the subject without seeming negative.

Also, when I hear people in my local store speak another language, I am curious because I am semi-fluent in three languages and interested in learning more, but again, what is a polite way to ask? — WONDERING IN VIRGINIA

DEAR WONDERING: If you have the slightest concern about asking your neighbors how to pronounce their name and what language it is, then don’t do it online. Ask another neighbor or wait until you can meet the person face-to-face.

When you are out and about and hear a language you don’t recognize, smile at the people, say that you speak three languages, like the way theirs sounds and ask what it is because you might like to learn it. If the question is asked in a friendly way, most people will answer in the same vein. (I did this at a supermarket recently. The answer was they came from Indonesia and were speaking Malay.)

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Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.